#z

Funny thing about revenge. It could make a killer out of a nun. ↗

— Kevis Hendrickson

#revenge #rogue-hunter-saga #zyra-zanr #funny

Teachers started recognizing me and praising me for being smart in science and that made me want to be even smarter in science! ↗

— Steve Wozniak

#being smart #even #made #me #praising

Weetzie could see him--it was a man, a little man in a turban, with a jewel in his nose, harem pants, and curly-toed slippers. "Lanky Lizards!" Weetzie exclaimed. "Greetings," said the man in an odd voice, a rich, dark purr. "Oh, shit!" Weetzie said. "I beg your pardon? Is that your wish? ↗

— Francesca Lia Block

#funny #genies #humor #weetzie-bat #wishes

For the purposes of the play, it was perfect to be able to use that and the stresses and strains that there were. At the end of the play, the mother realizes the terrible things she had done. ↗

— Fay Wray

#done #end #had #mother #perfect

If through no fault of his own the hero is crushed by a bulldozer in Act II, we are not impressed. Even though life is often like this—the absconding cashier on his way to Nicaragua is killed in a collision at the airport, the prominent statesman dies of a stroke in the midst of the negotiations he has spent years to bring about, the young lovers are drowned in a boating accident the day before their marriage—such events, the warp and woof of everyday life, seem irrelevant, meaningless. They are crude, undigested, unpurged bits of reality—to draw a metaphor from the late J. Edgar Hoover, they are “raw files.” But it is the function of great art to purge and give meaning to human suffering, and so we expect that if the hero is indeed crushed by a bulldozer in Act II there will be some reason for it, and not just some reason but a good one, one which makes sense in terms of the hero’s personality and action. In fact, we expect to be shown that he is in some way responsible for what happens to him. ↗

— Bernard Knox

#fate #meaning #plotting #purpose #writing

My armpits are not only rank, but they’re ranked number one in customer satisfaction. Try them for free or your money back. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#armpits #bizarre #customer-satisfaction #customers #free

They say a sneeze is 1/10th of an orgasm. Perhaps that’s why it takes me 18 seconds to sneeze. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#orgasm #sneeze #funny

Inside every woman, is a crazy girl. And we all know what I'm talking about. That part of you that is entangled with insecurities, fears, and absolute insanity! The art of femininity lies in the molding, pounding, and defeating of that crazy girl on a daily basis! Look at any woman, and you're looking at a woman fighting a daily battle, wielding her weapons in war, every day! I have said it before and I'll say it again: it is never easy being a woman! And if we could only pound that crazy, insecure girl out of ourselves, it would make such the difference! ↗

— C. JoyBell C.

#inner-strength #inspirational-quotes #overcoming-fear #overcoming-insecurities #women-s-inspirational

Death by bush,” I whisper. “What did you say?” Dylan asks confused. “The last thing that man saw before he almost died was my bush. ↗

— Ella Dominguez

#the-art-of-d-s #art

Schrödinger’s cat was a Siamese cat, must have been, because if it’s at once alive and dead, it’s a zombie, and the only zombie cats are Siamese cats. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #zombie #funny