#wome

If women were as good as men they'd be a lot better! ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#men #women #humor

Lucifer will be furious with you for failing, but it's not like he can do anything about it. Women don't always do what you want, even if you're Lord of the Underworld. ↗

— Trinity Faegen

#humor #strong-willed #women #humor

Everybody must be managed. Queens must be managed. Kings must be managed, for men want managing almost as much as women, and that's saying a good deal. ↗

— Thomas Hardy

#kings #men #queens #women #humor

...there is a celebrated aphorism insisting that the best way to live is to 'work like you don't need the money, dance like nobody is watching, and love like you've never been hurt.'...After years of hearing and reading these lines I have decided to tell the truth: the original version is wrong. There is a grave error in the wording of this adage. The correct version should go as follows: Love like you don't need the money, Work like nobody is watching, Dance like you've never been hurt. See? Doesn't that make more sense? ↗

— Gina Barreca

#gina-barreca #humor #women #humor

Southern Mamas are known for being subtle, like a freight train. ↗

— Shellie Rushing Tomlinson

#southern-women #humor

I discovered that seventeen-year-old girls have such huge verbal energy that their brain drives them to expend it every twenty seconds. On the third day I decided I had to find her a boyfriend -- if possible, a deaf one. ↗

— Carlos Ruiz Zafón

#women #humor

One minute she acts like she wants to be with me and I'm the one rejecting her. The next, she's got this barbed wire fence and barking dogs around her, like I can't even ask her the simplest questions." "And here I was assuming you didn't care about her." Stabbing his fingers through his hair, he groaned, "I don't!" "And you make it perfectly clear." Men. Idiots. ↗

— Jennifer Armintrout

#love #men-and-women #relationships #humor

You can get away with saying much more with humor than you can with a straight face ↗

— Sherry Argov

#love #relationships #humor

{Summertime she speaks of winter, she eats ham, but speaks of beef, got a good man but, flirts with another. She might as well go to hell, cause she ain't gonna be happy in heaven either!}www.nancybbrewer.com From new books coming soon- 3rd in Carolina Rain series. ↗

— Nancy B. Brewer

#history #humor #romance #southern #southern-women

Honey, if the man is that dense, you can drag that cot he been sleepin' on into your room, nab his clothes, and lay in wait for him. When he comes lookin' for his things, lock the door and settle the matter once and for all. ↗

— Karen Witemeyer

#sneaky #women-having-fun #humor