#wives

When we won the league championship, all the married guys on the club had to thank their wives for putting up with all the stress and strain all season. I had to thank all the single broads in New York. ↗

— Joe Namath

#championship #club #guys #had #i

I believe that because I had obtained a wife who was made up of wife-signs (beauty, charm, softness, perfume, cookery) I had found love. ↗

— Donald Barthelme

#humor #me-and-miss-mandible #short-story #wives #beauty

We treat our stone wives with much more care than they treat their warm ones, anyway. I personally dust mine once a week, and I know Khaamil gives them presents when I am not looking. These are yours - they are in your care, and you must be faithful. ↗

— Catherynne M. Valente

#wife #wives #faith

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. However little known the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that he is considered as the rightful property of someone or other of their daughters. ↗

— Jane Austen

#classics #marriage #men #possessiveness #single-men

I had made her so unhappy that she had developed a sense of humor. [-Rabo Karabekian] ↗

— Kurt Vonnegut

#rabo-karebekian #wife #wives #humor

May a man live well-enough and long-enough, to leave many joyful widows behind him. ↗

— Roman Payne

#men #pleasure #polygamy #roman-payne #widows

God bids you not to commit lechery, that is, not to have sex with any woman except your wife. You ask of her that she should not have sex with anyone except you -- yet you are not willing to observe the same restraint in return. Where you ought to be ahead of your wife in virtue, you collapse under the onset of lechery. ... Complaints are always being made about men's lechery, yet wives do not dare to find fault with their husbands for it. Male lechery is so brazen and so habitual that it is now sanctioned [= permitted], to the extent that men tell their wives that lechery and adultery are legitimate for men but not for women. ↗

— Augustine of Hippo

#clichés #double-standards #fidelity #gender #hypocrisy

My first [wife] was an angel; My second a silly woman; My third a Roman Senator; My fourth a pretty little thing; My fifth — all woman! ↗

— Nat C. Goodwin

#matrimony #wives #marriage

Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occurred to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths. ↗

— Bertrand Russell

#aristotle #examining #fewer #him #his

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man, then complain he's not the man she married? ↗

— Barbra Streisand

#marriage #men #men-and-women #wives #women