#witty

A technicality I'm prepared to hide wildly behind. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#witty

I wasn't used to guys making me blush, and I wasn't sure why he even was making me blush. ↗

— Holly Hood

#love #witty #love

He wasn't aware of it but when he smiled he looked like an amiable bear. When he didn't smile he didn't look amiable ↗

— Emma Goldrick

#funny #goldrick #harlequin-special-edition #hero #humor

(About a cookbook...) - What about this one? Maids of Honor? - Weeelll, they starts OUT as Maids of Honor...but they ends up Tarts. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#funny-and-random #humor #humorous #retort #satire

I wish I knew what you were talking about," she returned. "Where's the pin?" "Pin?" "Yes. Pin. To fasten the diaper. The kid can't hold the thing up with two hands. ↗

— Emma Goldrick

#funny

(…) Trying to think of how to take the least crowded ways to class, so the least amount of people will stare at the hole in my neck. Sometimes it feels like it has a beacon in it, flashing for the entire world to see, except it's not cool like the Bat signal. ↗

— Keary Taylor

#funny #hilarious #witty #funny

You get a promotion?" "I got a polite, but firm suggestion to be a team player. [...]" "You got off easy. One of my commanding officers once threw a paperweight at me." "We're a bit more subtle. ↗

— Nelson DeMille

#witty #funny

This is the fast lane, folks...and some of us like it here. ↗

— Hunter S. Thompson

#witty #humor

Graham's life is as tense as an overstretched simile. ↗

— Zane Stumpo

#funny #humor #humour #wit #witty

The phone beeped - M fine but these two guys R on me like cougars on Adam Lambert. ↗

— Elisabeth Staab

#funny #king-of-darkness #pnr #witty-quotes #funny