#witty

yes, i have dated Salvador Dali guy when i was a high school girl. he was a great lover. but i had to dump him because he stole my inspiration of bent clock*~* .... who cares... ↗

— Hiroko Sakai

#artwork #bent-clock #funny #humorous #painting

The problem with a life spent reading is you know too much. ↗

— Josh Lanyon

#reading #witty #humor

One must have a heart of stone to read the death of little Nell without laughing. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#uncle-tom-s-cabin #victorian #wilde #witty #death

Marianne would have thought herself very inexcusable had she been able to sleep at all the first night after parting from Willoughby. She would have been ashamed to look her family in the face the next morning, had she not risen from her bed in more need of repose than when she lay down in it. But the feelings which made such composure a disgrace, left her in no danger of incurring it. She was awake the whole night, and she wept the greatest part of it. She got up with an head-ache, was unable to talk, and unwilling to take any nourishment; giving pain every moment to her mother and sisters, and forbidding all attempt at consolation from either. Her sensibility was potent enough! ↗

— Jane Austen

#sensibility #witty-comments #family

Yes, I kidnapped that Lindberg baby. ↗

— Chuck Palahniuk

#hilarious #witty #funny

She didn‟t look like the athletic type to me.” “Maybe Nemov carried her. He looked like he could.” “He looked like he could carry his SUV. I don‟t know why he didn‟t. ↗

— Josh Lanyon

#taylor #witty #funny

Marriage is an honorable estate and should not be used simply as an excuse for legal intercourse. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#witty #humor

From time to time I once wondered how one wanders from time to time And think up the paradox line Speak of Epoch's crime Oh I lied, it hasn't happened yet But bet you better believe it's such a habit that I just said that in a past mindset ↗

— Criss Jami

#curiosity #epoch #fantasy #imagination #lies

If you were smart," Genghis said, "you would have borrowed the silverware of one of your friends." "We never thought of that," Klaus said. When one is forced to tell atrocious lies, one often feels a guilty flutter in one's stomach, and Klaus felt such a flutter now. "You certainly are an intelligent man." "Not only am I intelligent," Genghis agreed, "but I'm also very smart. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#clever #count-olaf #funny-humor #intelligent #lemony-snicket

Taking a single letter from the alphaber," he said, "should make life simpler." "I don't see why. Take the F from life and you have lie. It's adding a letter to simple that makes it simpler. Taking a letter from hoarder makes it harder. ↗

— James Thurber

#simpler #witty #life