#witty

I fear nothing so much as a man who is witty all day long. ↗

— Madame de Sevigne

#day #fear #i #long #man

Deke: 'You know what I'm wonderin'?' Malachi: 'No, and to tell the truth, I don't care' Deke: 'I'm wonderin' how you've managed to live to the ripe old age of 36, when it's a known fact that you've been brain-dead since birth' 'Strength of will', was the flat reply ↗

— Lynn Turner

#age

Well, don't expect us to be too impressed. We just saw Finnick Odair in his underwear. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#finnick #funny #humour #hunger-games #katniss

I like my relationships like I like my eggs. Over easy. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#eggs #funny #relationships #witty #witty

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#beards #children #dada #funny #funny-quotes

Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies. ↗

— Oliver Goldsmith

#humor #lies #questions #sarcasm #wit

I like to spoon after I fork. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#fork #funny #humor #spoon #witty

I think you smoke them so you have something to do while thinking up your next witty line." He choked on the smoke, caught between inhaling and laughing. "Rose Hathaway, I can't wait to see you again. If you're this charming while tired and annoyed and this gorgeous while bruised and in ski clothes, you must be devastating at your peak." "If by 'devastating' you mean that you should fear for your life, then yeah. You're right." I jerked open the door. "Good night, Adrian." "I'll see you soon." "Not likely. I told you, I'm not into older guys." I walked into the lodge. As the door closed, I just barely heard him call behind me, "Sure, you aren't. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#witty

When you paint late at night, drinking beer or wine or both, you gotta be very careful to watch what you are doing... ↗

— Hiroko Sakai

#artist #drinking #funny #humorous #night

His principles were out of date, but there was a good deal to be said for his prejudices. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#principles #witty #dating