#wife

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#her #i #me #psychiatrist #seeing

My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#car #drive #me #sex #she

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#coming home #door #home #just #me

My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#i #met #then #were #wife

I'd never heard of colon cancer. Baseball wasn't even important to me. I have a wife and two girls. That's what was important. The doctors told me and all I could say was, 'When are we going to get this thing out?' ↗

— Eric Davis

#cancer #colon #could #doctors #even

I had just broken up with my wife so I was searching for another way to live. ↗

— Michael Davis

#another way #broken #had #i #just

The manic pursuit of success cost me everything I could love: my wife, my three children, some friends I would have liked to grow old with. ↗

— Sammy Davis, Jr.

#cost #could #everything #friends #grow

I just love the storyline, I thought it was hilarious - I loved that part when we opened the door, we all look ahead and we have to look down and see that we're actually dealing with this little boy who did this horrible thing of ordering a wife through e-mail. ↗

— Caroline Dhavernas

#ahead #boy #dealing #did #door

I was not the midwife of the Law School, but its fraternal twin. ↗

— Norman Lamm

#i #law #law school #midwife #school

My wife never throws anything at me that I can't handle. ↗

— Taye Diggs

#handle #i #me #never #throws