#wedding

Every bride and groom in the history of civilization has gained weight after their wedding day. It is only a matter of time until archaeologists unearth a married caveman who's wearing a pair of old tux pants that were so tight he couldn't get the zipper closed. ↗

— Peter Scott

#wedding #weight #marriage

Oh! How many torments lie in the small circle of a wedding-ring! ↗

— Colley Cibber

#matrimony #wedding-ring #marriage

Hey wedding DJ, there is no way in hell I'm paying you $1,000 when all you're doing is plugging your iPod into the sound system #AHOLE ↗

— Andy Ostrom

#dance #dj #etiquette #marriage #wedding

Novels are written word by word. If you can write a word, and then another word, you can write a novel—assuming your novel will be two words long. Here’s a two-word romance novel: I do. It’s also a murder mystery.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #marriage #murder #murder-mystery #mystery

Newspaper columnist Dave Barry once wrote that the motto of the wedding industry is, 'Money can't buy you happiness, so you might as well give your money to us. ↗

— Denise Fields

#weddings #marriage

I'll meet you at the altar" "I'll be the one in white! ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#edward #wedding #twilight

All the information you could want is constantly streaming at you like a runaway truck - books, newspaper stories, Web sites, apps, how-to videos, this article you're reading, even entire magazines devoted to single subjects like charcuterie or wedding cakes or pickles. ↗

— Mario Batali

#books #cakes #constantly #could #devoted

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#behind #bride #fine #happiness #her

You may invite the entire 35th Division to your wedding if you want to. I guess it's going to be yours as well as mine. We might as well have the church full while we are at it. ↗

— Bess Truman

#church #division #entire #full #going

You’re just going to have your fiancé as your chaperone, and he isn’t allowed to touch. And you, Mrs. Gavarreen will remain untouchable, until the moment you say, I do. ↗

— Lindsay Delagair

#love #possessiveness #wedding #love