#v

It’s not technically gossip if you start your sentence with “I’m really concerned about __________________ ,” (fill in the name of the person you’re not gossiping about). ↗

— Brian P. Cleary

#humor #observational-comedy #observations #humor

To work hard, to live hard, to die hard, and then go to hell after all would be too damn hard. ↗

— Carl Sandburg

#damn #die #die hard #go #go to hell

Sorry I painted the word 'twat' on your garage door. ↗

— David Shrigley

#humor #regret #shrigley #vandalism #humor

One thing was certain: he was my one. Most people go on their whole lives and never find their one, but I found mine. I found him when I was twelve-years-old. ↗

— Jennifer Edlund

#friendship-and-love #love #love-story #young-lovers #friendship

One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace. ↗

— Victor Borge

#fire #fireplace #funny #humor #humorous

With great hotness comes great responsibility. ↗

— Alyxandra Harvey

#spiderman #vampires #humor

We never think lightly of those who walk with us on our uphill days. ↗

— Richelle E. Goodrich

#charity #friends #friendship #giving #kindness

He’s an indulgent sort of man…… With a quick lip and a fierce tongue, the sort of tongue that draws you in with charm and words of praise, awkward silences and desperate worships. ↗

— Coco J. Ginger

#charm #fierce-tongue #friendship-and-love #jamie-weise #love

The Lone Ranger of vampires. Did that make me Tonto? ↗

— Robin McKinley

#lone-ranger #vampires #humor

I am the Wizard of Oz of housewives (in that I am both "Great and Terrible" and because I sometimes hide behind the curtains ↗

— Jenny Lawson

#humor #wizard-of-oz #humor