#um

It took me a moment. I blinked, and suddenly it swam into focus and I had to frown very hard to keep myself from giggling out loud like the schoolgirl Deb had accused me of being. Because he had arranged the arms and legs in letters, and the letters spelled out a single small word: BOO. The three torsos were carefully arranged below the BOO in a quarter-circle, making a cute little Halloween smile. What a scamp. ↗

— Jeff Lindsay

#dark-humor #dexter #dexter-morgan #dismemberment #halloween

This exchange marked the beginning of Mr. Malfoy's long campaign to have me removed from my post as headmaster of Hogwarts, and of mine to have him removed from his position as Lord Voldemort's Favorite Death Eater. My response prompted several further letters from Mr. Malfoy, but as they consisted mainly of opprobrious remarks on my sanity, parentage, and hygiene, their relevance to this commentary is remote. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#malfoy #death

I have a simple life. I mean, you just give me a drum roll, they announce my name, and I come out and sing. In my job I have a contract that says I'm a singer. So I sing. ↗

— Tony Bennett

#come #contract #drum #give #give me

I mean Iggy and The Stooges first couple of albums I think sold twenty five thousand between the two of them you know and so to talk in terms of an underground I mean you have to go really to the independent labels and things like that. ↗

— Lester Bangs

#between #couple #first #five #go

I’ll show you a fag, you little bitch. I’ll fuck-start your head! ↗

— C.J. Roberts

#humor

Always follow your dreams, even if they lead you down a few dark alleys. ↗

— Teresa Mummert

#overcoming-obstacles #teresa-mummert #dreams

Wow, someone woke up on the wrong side of the Midol. ↗

— Denise Jaden

#confidence #humor #faith

All I ever thought was, 'I'm going to do this as long as I can, and if I can't get paid at it, I'll be a bum doing it.' And so, here I am. ↗

— Bruce Cockburn

#bum #doing #ever #get #going

For a moment she was convinced she was still dreaming. That she’d fallen asleep while reading one of JR Ward’s Brotherhood of The Black Dagger romances and had inserted herself into a dream based on the book. Any moment now he was going to start growling Mine Mine Mine and let loose with some spicy bonding scent. Or flash a massive set of fangs. ↗

— Trish McCallan

#dreams

You didn’t really hold back on Braga so Pickering could kill him, did you?” Royce asked after the two were left alone in the hallway. “Of course not. I held off because it’s death for a commoner to kill a noble.” “That’s what I thought.” Royce sounded relieved. “For a minute, I wondered if you’d gone from jumping on the good-deed wagon to leading the whole wagon train. ↗

— Michael J. Sullivan

#death