#uf

She’s not showing any interest in me and she looks like she doesn’t want to be here. Should I take off her handcuffs? I thought kidnap victims were supposed to fall in love with their captors?
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— Jarod Kintz

#fall-in-love #handcuffs #interest #kidnap #kidnapped

Really, these wizards! You'd think no one had ever had a cold before! Well, what is it?" she asked, hobbling through the bedroom door onto the filthy carpet. "I'm dying of boredom," Howl said pathetically. "Or maybe just dying. ↗

— Diana Wynne Jones

#howl-pendragon #humor #insuferable #lazy #sophie-hatter

Spike (to Giles) : Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes — 'Cuppa tea, cuppa tea... almost got shagged... cuppa tea'? ↗

— Marti Noxon

#humor #snark #humor

The confessing church of American Ragamuffins needs to join Magdalene and Peter in witnessing that Christianity is not primarily a moral code but a grace-laden mystery; it is not essentially a philosophy of love but a love affair; it is not keeping rules with clenched fists but receiving a gift with open hands. ↗

— Brennan Manning

#grace #love #ragamuffins #love

A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love. ↗

— Stendhal

#birth #cause #degree #hope #small

People who entered the Courtyard without an invitation were just plain crazy! Wolves were big and scary and so fluffy, how could anyone resist hugging one just to feel all that fur? “Ignore the fluffy,” she muttered. “Remember the part about big and scary. ↗

— Anne Bishop

#humor #werewolves #wolves #humor

Simon laughed heartily. “I’m afraid the rest of us have to find talents to get our women into bed. Of course once they’re there, I have other talents that keep them right where they are.” “Handcuffs hardly count,” Christian said offhandedly. “If you mean the ladies cuffing me to the bed so they can explore Hunt Island,” he said, rubbing his chest, “…then point taken. These hands are capable of making any female climax by the mere brush of a pinky across her bare breast.” “I must have gone to the wrong island,” I said with a private laugh. ↗

— Dannika Dark

#breast #climax #handcuffs #humor #paranormal

We can arrange class time with, um, minimum interaction." That's perfect. The part where the interacting is all minimum-y," Montgomery said eagerly. That was almost a Buffyism," Mica pointed out to Ellen. Almost," Ellen admitted grudgingly. ↗

— Tracy Lynn

#geek #humor #humor

Love is like a buffalo with butterfly wings, and I’m just the humble man in the jetpack trying to shoot it down with a bow and arrow.
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— Jarod Kintz

#bow #buffalo #butterfly #humble #humility

All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff. ↗

— Frank Zappa

#been #good #good music #music #people