#tim

They were friends. That's all she ever seemed to have. Friends. She had enough of them. ↗

— Melissa de la Cruz

#lost-in-time #melissa-de-la-cruz #friendship

I want to go to sleep in my time machine and wake up eight hours in the future. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#future #sleep #time-machine #funny

Why did you tell her I'm your boyfriend? Why doesn't she know about your real one? - Timmy He's English! And Mom...Mom hates foreigners! - Cat ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#cat #funny #timmy #funny

If I promise you I'll show up fifteen minutes late, I'll always arrive on time. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#late #on-time #promise #punctuality #funny

I like watching people stretch in the park. It's my new favorite pastime since I bought a portable rack. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#pastime #stretch #funny

When anybody asks me what time it is, I always say, “Yesterday, plus 24 hours. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#time #yesterday #funny

It's funny, don't you think, how time seems to do a lot of things? It flies, it tells, and worst of all, it runs out. ↗

— Markus Zusak

#funny

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. ↗

— Hector Berlioz

#kills #pupils #teacher #time #unfortunately

Deliverance is about what I went through the first time. And I chalk it up as a learning experience. ↗

— Bubba Sparxxx

#chalk #deliverance #experience #first #first time

Rather than waste a whole day, I would rather spend it counting to 86,400. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#waste-of-time #funny