#sweater

I suffer from peroxide phobia. Every time I've gotten near a blond woman, something of mine has disappeared. Jobs, boyfriends... one time an angora sweater leaped right off my body. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#body #disappeared #every #every time #gotten

I have too much money invested in sweaters. ↗

— Bob Hope

#invested #money #much #sweaters #too

I still sweat. My guts are still grinding out there. Sometimes I have enough cotton in my mouth to knit a sweater. ↗

— Lee Trevino

#enough #grinding #guts #i #knit

Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#child #chilly #feeling #garment #mother