#surreal

One of the most surreal moments in this election was after the third debate, when I heard a talking head say, Al Gore won on substance, on the issues. But you have to give the victory to Bush because he seems presidential. ↗

— Bradley Whitford

#al #al gore #because #bush #debate

I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dreams #funny #humor #life #sleeping

A brick could be used to represent no, and a blanket could be used to represent yes. If I ask you, “Will you sleep with me?” I expect you to run to the bedroom, get naked, and get under the blanket. Whatever you do, do not reach for the brick.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used as a cock block. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

If love had feathers and tasted like dog food, then I suggest you wear shoes with your banana pudding. (This statement also defines my political beliefs). ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#beliefs #funny #love #political #politics

Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with fins and gills are called. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#aquatic #bizarre #creatures #fins #fish

There’s nothing I like better than a beautiful sunset. Except maybe a gorgeous sunrise. And a naked woman painted pink and orange floating through the sky. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #sunset #surreal #beauty

I want to see an elephant hunt down a man for the sole purpose of collecting his teeth, while a chorus of typewriters sings songs that praises the bananas for their wisdom, leadership, and their high levels of potassium. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #dada #funny #humor #hunt

I think it was more personal, but I certainly tried to adapt certain concepts of Surrealism. ↗

— Trevor Dunn

#certain #certainly #concepts #i #i think

I can’t define what love is. That’s like eating a pancake with a waffle instead of a fork. But you know it when you feel it, like petting a cat wearing a synthetic fur coat. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #love #surreal #funny