#spoon

As much as I would love to know what you know, I’d much rather eat your brain with a spoon.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#eat #food #knowledge #spoon #food

I am three forks away from eating all your food with two homeless guys. It’s too bad I only have a suitcase full of spoons and a bucket of soy sauce.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#food #funny #homeless #humor #nonsense

I always carry a spoon in my pocket. You know, just in case it rains.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #pocket #preparation #prepared #rain

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. ↗

— Dorothy Parker

#humor #misattributed #spoonerism #wordplay #humor

My love for you would blot out the sun like a cloud made out of yogurt. I hope you brought a spoon. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #blot-out #cloud #funny #humor

Most civilized lives are measured out with coffee spoons. ↗

— Bergen Evans

#life #life

Could you have possibly put more water between us? ↗

— Saundra Mitchell

#love #nathaniel-witherspoon #love

Brittany Murphy... who knows if she's going to be around. Kirsten Dunst, I think she's really boring. Reese Witherspoon? She can open a movie. ↗

— Jackie Collins

#boring #brittany #going #i #i think

I once got a letter from a woman who told me she was 90. She said if she were 30 years younger, I would have had to watch out. I guess 60 seems really young when you're 90. She said she would eat me with a spoon. ↗

— David James Elliott

#got #guess #had #i #letter

To be born in Wales, not with a silver spoon in your mouth, but, with music in your blood and with poetry in your soul, is a privilege indeed. ↗

— Brian Harris

#born #indeed #mouth #music #poetry