#som

He put the book down. “As you wish.” He rose and walked past me. I lowered my sword, expecting him to pass, but suddenly he stepped in dangerously close. “Welcome home. I’m glad you made it. There is coffee in the kitchen for you.” My mouth gaped open. He inhaled my scent, bent close, about to kiss me… I just stood there like an idiot. Curran smirked and whispered in my ear instead. “Psych.” And just like that, he was out the door and gone. Oh boy. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#curran #flirting #kate #princess-bride #awesome

You can say the opposite of something you've said but you can't do the opposite of something you've done. ↗

— Jose Bergamin

#opposite #said #say #something #you

Knowing that she loved me, hoping that she loved me, opened some kind of door in my heart. And all the love I'd forgotten or pushed away came flooding back in. ↗

— Sherri Lee Emmons

#forgotten #hope #love #the-sometimes-daughter #love

I was just kidding, shuck-face," Minho said. "Let's all go over there. She could have an army of psycho girl ninjas hiding in that shack of hers." "Psycho girl ninjas?" Newt repeated, his voice showing he was surprised, if not annoyed, by Minho's additude. ↗

— James Dashner

#epic #humor #ninjas #humor

Mr. Pot drank ten pots of coffee, even though I only made eight. That’s a savings of 20%!
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #coffee #funny #humor #random

I managed to beat Michael Phelps’ 400 meter IM time. And not only did I beat his time, but I did it in exactly 200 meters.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #compete #competition #competitive #delusional

Voting for the lesser of two evils is still voting for evil. Next time, why don’t you go all out and write in Lucifer on the ballot?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #politicians #politics

As an instrument for practical action, law is responsive to the wisdom of its time, which may be wrong, but it carries forward, sometimes in opposition to this wisdom or passion, a memory of received values. ↗

— Edward Levi

#carries #forward #instrument #law #may

Principled hate is a hell of a lot stronger than "Boy, I wish you hadn't mummified me and thrown me into the lake" hate. ↗

— John Green

#humor #humor

I invited a few people to help celebrate your birthday," Cameron said sheepishly. She threw up her hands. "Surprise." "We sort of come with the package," Collin explained. "Think of it as a collective gift from all of us to you: five bona fide annoying and overly intrusive new best friends." "It's the gift that keeps on giving," Wilkins said. Jack grinned. "I'm touched. Really. And since it appears I'm going to be moving in, let me be the first to say that all of you are always welcome at my and Cameron's house. Subject to a minimum of forty-eight hours prior notification. ↗

— Julie James

#julie-james #romance #something-about-you #humor