#sex

Today I will masterbate! Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written "Today I will masterbate--if I want to! ↗

— Al Franken

#humor #masturbation #sex #freedom

Sex drives the world and sex in on every human mind, be it a prophet or be it a saint, history has full of evidences. ↗

— Santosh Kalwar

#sex #humor

I can count all the lovers I've had on one hand...if I'm holding a calculator. ↗

— Sebastian Horsley

#humor #lovers #sebastian-horsley #sex #humor

I used to think that looking across a pillow into the fabulous face of Buster Keaton would be a more thrilling destiny than any screen career. ↗

— Anita Loos

#sex #stardom #humor

I don’t want to be your snack, your chew-toy, your fuck-buddy. Find a vampire to sink your fang into. ↗

— Nalini Singh

#humor #power #sex #vampires #humor

Studies show adolescent males often make decisions based on sex. Many fail to grow out of it. ↗

— Nora Roberts

#sex #humor

Let’s quit our jobs and fuck all day. ↗

— Cara McKenna

#humor #sex #humor

Consider, if you will, the morning boner. What a metaphor of hope and renewal! How can anyone give way to despair when one’s groin greets each day with such a gala spectacle of physical optimism? ↗

— C.D. Payne

#humor #optimism #sex #teens #humor

Magdalena pulls me away by the arm. “I am the stronger one of Titus and I,” she says over the marketplace din. “Woman are always the stronger sex.” She smiles to herself. “The trick is not appearing to be so. ↗

— Lynn Cullen

#lynn-cullen #sex #women #humor

Katy skipped over, her low-rise jeans threatening to fall off her skinny hips. With some girls, that was a sexy look. With Katy, it made you nervous. ↗

— Sara Zarr

#jeans #sexy #teenagers #humor