#satire

He burst into the house and ate Grandma, an entirely valid course of action for a carnivore such as himself. ↗

— James Finn Garner

#humour #politically-correct #red-riding-hood #satire #wolf

The people heard it, and approved the doctrine, and immediately practiced the contrary. ↗

— Benjamin Franklin

#contradiction #doctrines #paradox #practice #rules

Perhaps,” murmured his lordship, “I yielded to a compassionate impulse.” “A what?” gasped his best friend. “Oh, did you think I never did so?” said his lordship, the satirical glint in his eyes extremely pronounced. “You wrong me! I do, sometimes—not frequently, of course, but every now and then! ↗

— Georgette Heyer

#satire

My pen shall heal, not hurt. ↗

— L.M. Montgomery

#satire #writing #satire

Satirize wickedness if you must--but pity weakness. ↗

— L.M. Montgomery

#pity #satire #weakness #satire

The wicked are wicked, no doubt, and they go astray and they fall, and they come by their deserts; but who can tell the mischief which the very virtuous do? ↗

— William Makepeace Thackeray

#satire #vanity #satire

It is proved...that things cannot be other than they are, for since everything was made for a purpose, it follows that everything is made for the best purpose. ↗

— Voltaire

#satire

I suppose that saves us from having to determine what to do with a butler who goes around killing people. It certainly reflects badly upon our domestic staff. Still, I shall miss him. There was a man who knew how to brew a good cup of tea. ↗

— Gail Carriger

#hyperbole #satire #satire

As an experienced editor, I disapprove of flashbacks, foreshadowings, and tricksy devices; they belong in the 1980s with M.A.s in postmodernism and chaos theory. ↗

— David Mitchell

#satire #writing #satire

laws and conditions appropriate to a mechanical creation, against this I raise my sword-pen. ↗

— Anthony Burgess

#satire