#sarcastic

In every day and in every way, we're all that much closer to death. ↗

— Charles Atkins

#humor #sarcastic #death

I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like? ↗

— Jean Cocteau

#humor

Nobody should have to die to a crappy soundtrack ↗

— James R. Tuck

#sarcastic-humor #humor

Though he’d never know for sure what had happened to them, his mind was super talented at imagining the absolute worst. ↗

— James Dashner

#humor

I wish I could say I’m low maintenance, but I like some of the finer things in life…like a toothbrush. ↗

— M.A. George

#low-maintenance #paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #the-finer-things-in-life #life

...,I have never visited any city in the world where I was not told that I just missed the golden age. I seem never to be on time." Cyrus Sitema ↗

— Gore Vidal

#age

Perfect! Now we're being chased by hoards of monkeys! Perhaps you would care to name their species as we're attacked, just so I can appreciate the special traits of said monkey as it kills me!" "At least when the monkeys are harassing you, you dont have any time to harass me! ↗

— Colleen Houck

#sarcastic #appreciation

Why did you ask me to live with you? Werewolves hate vampires.” “I don’t,” said Kyle.” I’m not too fond of their kind, though.” He jabbed a finger at Jace. “They think they’re better than everyone else.” “No,” said Jace. “I think I’m better than everyone else. An opinion that has been backed up with ample evidence.” Kyle looked at Simon. “Does he always talk like this?” “Yes. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #sarcastic #opinions

There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world. ↗

— Jean Baudrillard

#adult #children #demand #festival #funny

My instincts told me that death would somehow be…different. But my rational mind reminded me that I had probably tempted fate one too many times. At least, I thought it was my rational mind. It sure seemed like the usual voice inside my head. Thank God there was only one of them. ↗

— M.A. George

#paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #voices-inside-your-head #death