#sarcastic

I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like? ↗

— Jean Cocteau

#humor

Too young,too young,she chanted to herself. Wrong,of course. I was older than her grandfather but according to my driver's license,she was right. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#humor

If money’s the god people worship, I’d rather go worship the devil instead. ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#commercialism #core #core-of-the-soul #core-values #devil

Perfect! Now we're being chased by hoards of monkeys! Perhaps you would care to name their species as we're attacked, just so I can appreciate the special traits of said monkey as it kills me!" "At least when the monkeys are harassing you, you dont have any time to harass me! ↗

— Colleen Houck

#sarcastic #appreciation

Why did you ask me to live with you? Werewolves hate vampires.” “I don’t,” said Kyle.” I’m not too fond of their kind, though.” He jabbed a finger at Jace. “They think they’re better than everyone else.” “No,” said Jace. “I think I’m better than everyone else. An opinion that has been backed up with ample evidence.” Kyle looked at Simon. “Does he always talk like this?” “Yes. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #sarcastic #opinions

My whole family is very sarcastic and constantly making jokes. ↗

— Emily Deschanel

#family #jokes #making #sarcastic #very

It's fun to be sarcastic, but now I'm able to express myself in a way that's much more sincere. ↗

— Christina Ricci

#express #fun #i #more #much

By the light," he said, when he had mastered himself. "I think that beats singing a lullaby to a stormdog for simplicity and economy, Maerad. But I wish I had known that you simply had to blow at Hulls to get rid of them. It would have saved me a few scars. ↗

— Alison Croggon

#humor #sarcastic #funny

And I’ll wager you thought him the handsomest thing that ever you saw in your life.” “I did. And if you stuck him, and stuffed him, and hung him on the wall, I’d be very glad to admire him. But in life he’s an arrogant pig, and I didn’t care for him at all. ‘Mind who you look at, wench.’ Foo! ↗

— Diane Stanley

#beauty #sarcastic-humor #beauty

The cleanest civilization I’ve ever seen…and the number one thing you pack for a wedding is a jar of dirt? ↗

— M.A. George

#paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #wedding-traditions #humor