#sarcastic

You may be the only guy my age I've ever met who knows what bergamot is, much less that it's in Earl Grey tea." "Yes, well," Jace said, with a supercilious look, "I'm not like other guys. Besides," he added, flipping a book off the shelf, "at the Institute we have to take classes in basic medicinal uses for plants. It's required." "I figured all your classes were stuff like Slaughter 101 and Beheading for Beginners." Jace flipped a page. "Very funny, Fray. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#funnt #sarcastic-quotesic #tea #age

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That's why I'm constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#communication #conversations #funny #humor #mind

Educational system in America is not as good as in China. You may be an idiot. It is hard to tell with you white people. ↗

— Kate Danley

#sarcastic #education

Jaime, dear, forgive me, but I don't think you are man enough to take care of my Cass. She's a special kind of difficult. ↗

— Mercy Celeste

#romance #sarcastic-humor #forgiveness

Too young,too young,she chanted to herself. Wrong,of course. I was older than her grandfather but according to my driver's license,she was right. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#humor

Phrase the question any way you like…The answer will still be ‘Kiss my ass. ↗

— M.A. George

#kiss-my-ass #paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #humor

Are you fighting evil tonight?...Then you are doing the Lord's work. Shut the fuck up. ↗

— James R. Tuck

#humor

...,I have never visited any city in the world where I was not told that I just missed the golden age. I seem never to be on time." Cyrus Sitema ↗

— Gore Vidal

#age

If money’s the god people worship, I’d rather go worship the devil instead. ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#commercialism #core #core-of-the-soul #core-values #devil

Perfect! Now we're being chased by hoards of monkeys! Perhaps you would care to name their species as we're attacked, just so I can appreciate the special traits of said monkey as it kills me!" "At least when the monkeys are harassing you, you dont have any time to harass me! ↗

— Colleen Houck

#sarcastic #appreciation