#sarcasm

You like them," I realized. Noah's eyebrows lifted in question. "Like as people." "As opposed to...furniture?" "They're my PARENTS." "That is my understanding, yes. ↗

— Michelle Hodkin

#sarcasm #humor

You must have been going very fast." "I was, until I hit the fence. ↗

— Anthony Horowitz

#sarcasm #humor

Sarcasm creates a chasm between yourself and others. ↗

— Gayle Forman

#sarcasm #humor

Yeah you can have a word," said Harry savagely. "Good-bye. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#sarcasm #tell-off #wit #humor

could you attempt, at least, to make yourself presentable? I know this is a war, but the rest of us are trying to pretend it's a party. ↗

— Kristin Cashore

#sarcasm #humor

Why can't these American women stay in their own country? They are always telling us that it is the paradise for women. It is. That is the reason why, like Eve, they are so excessively anxious to get out of it. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#escape #eve #humor #paradise #sarcasm

Can you enter a house uninvited?" "No." "Why?" "That would be rude. ↗

— Abigail Gibbs

#humor #sarcasm #vampire-mythology #violet #humor

I couldn’t see Pritkin’s face very well, just a pale blur against the shadows, but he didn’t sound happy. Some people thought he had only one mode... pissed off. In reality, he had plenty of them. Over the past few weeks, I’d learned to tell the difference between real pissed off, impatient pissed off and scared pissed off. I suspected that this was the last kind. If so, that made two of us. ↗

— Karen Chance

#humor #karen-chance-sarcasm #pritkin #humor

I have church on Sunday.” “Of course you do.” “You’re welcome to come along.” “Thanks, but I’m allergic to incense.” “That’s a shame.” “It’s the bane of my existence.” - Beth and Jake ↗

— Alexandra Adornetto

#religion #sarcasm #humor

It’s sarcasm, Josh.” “Sarcasm?” “It’s from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you aren’t really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.” “Well, if the village idiot named it, I’m sure it’s a good thing.” “There you go, you got it.” “Got what?” “Sarcasm.” “No, I meant it.” “Sure you did.” “Is that sarcasm?” “Irony, I think.” “What’s the difference?” “I haven’t the slightest idea.” “So you’re being ironic now, right?” “No, I really don’t know.” “Maybe you should ask the idiot.” “Now you’ve got it.” “What?” “Sarcasm. ↗

— Christopher Moore

#irony #sarcasm #humor