#rick

History generally records that Michael Vaughan quit the England captaincy in tearful circumstances following the Test-series defeat to South Africa in 2008. But the Top Spin can reveal this version of events is little more than a smokescreen. For it appears that what actually tipped Vaughan over the edge was a phonecall from a stricken team-mate - a call so harrowing Vaughan decided he could cope no longer. The ex-skipper was enjoying a barbecue at home with friends two summers ago when he took a rare call from Monty Panesar. 'Hello, Monty.' 'Hello Vaughany. I've got some bad news for you.' 'Oh?' 'Yes, you know I was telling you about my parrot Gary last week?' 'Er...' 'Well, he's gone missing. Just thought you'd like to know.' 'Sorry to hear that Monty.' 'Bye.' 'Bye.' So aghast was Vaughan that captaincy duty now extended to fielding calls from team-mates about escaped pets that he knew his time was up. Sure, the tears at the farewell press conference left an impression on us all. But it was Monty's ex-parrot that sealed the deal. ↗

— Lawrence Booth

#michael-vaughan #monty-panesar #home

A blanket could represent change, and a brick represents consistency. Do you embrace the blanket, or the brick?
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be lodged inside a home to provide comfort, stability, hope, change, and audacity. Oh gosh! Sorry about the last three—I was in my political bullshit mode again.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #change

A blanket could be used to communicate with dolphins. Be quiet! I’m trying to talk to the swimming mammals. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used to communicate with the dead. I just spoke to Stalin, and he’s very pleased with the way America’s progressing, collectively, as a country.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used to destroy your mannequin lover. It’s the only proper thing to do. Remember, I was the one who warned you about dating a politician.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

It is cold at six-forty in the morning on a March day in Paris, and seems even colder when a man is about to be executed by firing squad. ↗

— Frederick Forsyth

#execution #first-line #first-lines #first-sentence #frederick-forsyth

A jet may be perfect for breaking the speed of sound, but a brick is designed to break the speed of silence. Just listen to that quietness.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #design

I’m surprised there isn’t a jet airplane designed in the shape of a brick. Some people (aeronautical engineers) might say that’s because bricks aren’t aerodynamic. Yeah, right. I’d like to see someone make that claim as they watch a brick flying towards their face at a high velocity. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

A brick could be used to help you maintain a balanced diet, by keeping your head perfectly still with the brick steady on your skull while you eat.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny