#retort

You want me to invite him to dinner.” “I want you to invite him to dinner,” she agreed. “You know,” he said, “most gay men don’t have mothers who are this enthusiastic about their love lives.” “That’s probably true,” she said. “You’re one of the lucky ones. ↗

— Matthew Haldeman-Time

#retort #wit #love

I can understand bitchiness in any language. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#humor #retort #richelle-mead #snarkiness #age

I often warn people: "Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no "I" in team.' What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. But there is an "I" in independence, individuality and integrity. ↗

— George Carlin

#humor #individuality #retort #humor

The second mouse gets the cheese!" - The Inimitable Terry Pratchett ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#mouse #proverb #retort #education

I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend ... if you have one." — George Bernard Shaw, playwright (to Winston Churchill) "Cannot possibly attend first night; will attend second, if there is one." — Churchill's response ↗

— Winston Churchill

#retort #responsibility