#random

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #random




Now there's a girl I don't want to mess with' — or at least, that's what I would think if I had a chronic fear of freakishly nice people.


Nenia Campbell


#funny-and-random #humor #niceness #funny

A brick could be used to keep thieves away from your house. Just set a brick outside your front door, and you won’t need any additional security. Years will go by and nobody will steal the brick. And because the brick won’t get stolen, it’s proof that it deterred thieves from approaching your property.



Jarod Kintz


#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be modified to be a cell phone, for construction workers who miss the easy to find cell phone size of the 1980s.


Jarod Kintz


#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used to block a mouse hole. But something better that would not only block the hole physically, but also psychologically, would be to stuff a dead rat in the hole.



Jarod Kintz


#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick would make a great stocking stuffer at Christmas—especially if you chisel it out of the fireplace the stocking is hanging from. Let the homeowner know how much you care.



Jarod Kintz


#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

He'd have to turn on his high-voltage charm with these people. Should work. They were only used to 12V battery power after all-he'd dazzle them.


Josephine Myles


#funny

There may be a sucker born every minute, but every 30 seconds a lollipop pops out.



Jarod Kintz


#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

I’ve compiled a list of five suspects, and all five could be mistakenly narrowed down to one by a lesser investigator, because all five are nearly identical in physical demeanor and dimensions. They could all be monozygotic twins, or clones, or holographic projections of each other. They all are egg-shaped like humpty Dumpty, only more omelet-like in the face, as each has two beady black olive eyes, thin strips of bacon for lips, and a rosy grape tomato for a nose.


Jarod Kintz


#random #funny

He had bright elfin eyes and a knowledgeable ass.


Chris Hannan


#funny

A blanket could be twirled in the air, like a new idea in your mind, and then either discarded or folded up like a wearable memory.



Jarod Kintz


#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny