#rachel

I won’t snatch, harm, or scare to death people with you or use checking up on you as an excuse to cause trouble. You’re worse than my mother, Rachel.” “Mine, too,” Jenks muttered. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#demon-dealing #humor #rachel #death

What about e-mail? It is e-mail, yes?" Morley asked, leaning even closer. "E-mail is a kind of electronic letter. It travels through the air." He seemed very smug that he knew that. "Well, not exactly, and would you please either BACK OFF or go find a shower? ↗

— Rachel Caine

#morganville-vampires #morley #rachel-caine #death

Why aren't you afraid of me? I've seen my death, and you're not it. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#rachel #death

He's not doing anything he shouldn't be doing, right?" "Like what?" "Like hitting on you." "Ew. No, of course not. He doesn't see me that way." Michael shook his head and went back to his coffee. "What? You think he does?" "Sometimes he looks at you a little... oddly, that's all. Maybe you're right. Maybe he just wants you for your blood." "Again, Ew! What's with you this morning?" "Not enough coffee. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#funny #ghost-town #humor #michael-glass #morganville-vampires

No. Don't distract me with your sexy talk. ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#archer-cross #hex-hall #humor #rachel-hawkins #sexy

The hand on my hair moved to my back, and I realized someone was singing softly. The voice was familiar, and something about it made my chest ache. Well, that was to be expected. Angels' songs would be awfully poignant. "'I was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when I met you...'" the voice crooned. I frowned. Was that really an appropriate song for the Heavenly Host to be-- ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#cocktail-bar #grace #hex-hall #humor #mom

He probably would've raised an eyebrow in that annoying/hot way he had, and made a dirty joke about Elodie possessing me. ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#dirty #elodie #hex-hall #humor #rachel-hawkins

Well, friend, I don’t know about your tastes, but I tend to like it very bloody,” Myrnin said. He shifted position, dragging Claire along like a rag doll without any effort at all. “Have we been introduced?” “Probably not. Why, are you asking me out, sweetheart?” “You’re not my type, darling. Is this one yours?” “No,” Frank said, and looked at Shane, just in a quick flicker. “Let’s say she’s a friend of the family. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#eve-rosser #funny #ghost-town #humor #michael-glass

I'd blurted out the question only to keep him from noticing that I was working my hands free, but the Warden behind me, some young brown-haired surfer dude, yelled a warning. "She's getting loose!" Narc. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#rachel-caine #thin-air #humor

I wrestled futilely, then relaxed as a vine wrapped three times around my throat and squeezed. Right," I choked out, and shut my eyes. "I'll wait here, then. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#rachel-caine #thin-air #humor