#quota

Oh God, my stomach must have won a medal- it's doing a lap of honour now. ↗

— Ali McNamara

#love-story #humor

The truckers are staring," I said after a few seconds. It was true. They were. The whole row of them was doing a bad job of pretending not to look at us. "We just got engaged," Lucy shouted over to them. "I just asked this man to be my wife." The men at the counter traded confused looks. I burst out laughing. "We're glad you and your ass cracks could share this moment with us," she went on. "Seriously. We really are. Those are serious cracks and this is a serious moment. ↗

— Nick Burd

#humor

Eventually my dad got home from work and set his briefcase down. 'So. How was practice?' he asked 'It was good. Why? Did you hear it wasn't?' I said, trying to keep my cool. 'Son, no offense, but you play Little League. It's not the Yankees. I don't get daily reports about who's hitting the shit out of the ball ↗

— Justin Halpern

#keeping-your-cool #humor

I believe it was Gayelord Hauser, the nutritionist, who said, 'You are what you eat,' but if you happen to be an intellectual, you are what you quote. ↗

— Joseph Epstein

#humor #quotatious #humor

At the point so near to zero, just almost before the death, life’s value jumps to infinity! ↗

— Mehmet Murat ildan

#death

Love is as we will it to be." ~ Amunhotep El Bey ↗

— Amunhotep El Bey

#funny #humorous-quotations #inspirational-quotations #lol #motivational-quotations

He who coordinates his thoughts with his actions controls his own destiny.” ~ Amunhotep El Bey ↗

— Amunhotep El Bey

#inspire #motivate #motivational-quotations #philosophical-quotations #death

In my book an erection constitutes personal growth. ↗

— Amunhotep El Bey

#fun #funny #funny-quotations #humor #humorous-quotations

I love with love, so that we all may love." ~ Amunhotep El Bey ↗

— Amunhotep El Bey

#poetry #poetry-quotations #poetry-quotes #quote #quotes

Some people are born with a fire inside them. The will to succeed. It isn’t a learned behavior. It’s just some unknown biological factor that makes them try harder. ↗

— J.A. Konrath

#quotable #biology