#police

Unquestionably, it was going to be highly dangerous. Yet I felt it was quite natural to jump at the task. After all, if you don't like action and excitement, you don't go into police work. And, what the hell, I figured, nobody lives forever! ↗

— Eliot Ness

#after #dangerous #excitement #felt #figured

In an era when information can be sent instantaneously anywhere, it is utterly nonsensical that our Nation's police, the fire, and EMS personnel cannot consistently communicate with each other. ↗

— Bill Pascrell

#cannot #communicate #consistently #each #era

If I win and get the money, then the Oakland Police department is going to buy a boys' home, me a house, my family a house, and a Stop Police Brutality Center. ↗

— Tupac Shakur

#buy #center #department #family #get

The police seemed to think I killed her, which is crazy, because I loved her like a thousand drops of blood dripping down a dagger. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dagger #death #framed #guilt #guilty

The cops came by and said my nemesis had been poisoned, shot, stabbed, beaten, hung, drowned, and subjected to Gilbert Gottfried’s voice at a high decibel level. “Ah,” I said, “so you suspect his death was a suicide.”
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#death #funny #humor #nemesis #police

Who is more to be pitied, a writer bound and gagged by policemen or one living in perfect freedom who has nothing more to say? ↗

— Kurt Vonnegut

#freedom #gagged #living #more #nothing

I called the police to report my missing mustache, but they didn’t take me seriously. I’ll bet if I had a mustache, they’d take me seriously. #catch22
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cops #funny #humor #mustache #police

Dave? This is John." "What are you-" Alive? "-in an ambulance or something?" "Yes and no. Are you still at the police station?" "Yeah. We were both-" "Have I died yet? ↗

— David Wong

#died-yet #funny #john #police #funny

Great idea," I said. "Call the police. Call the fucking police. ↗

— Ava Gardner

#fighting #frank-sinatra #humor #police #humor

If you're going to hit a car, try to be sure that it's not a cop car ↗

— Judy Gold

#police #wisdom #humor