#pizza

No one could have prepared for me BBQ on pizza. I mean, both are great. But together? It was incredible. ↗

— Pau Gasol

#could #great #i #incredible #me

I talked to a calzone for fifteen minutes last night before I realized it was just an introverted pizza. I wish all my acquaintances were so tasty.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#alone #calzone #communicate #communication #desperation

That's because Tod never brings anything but death and bad advice," I snapped. "That's not true." Tod tried to grin, "Sometimes I bring pizza. ↗

— Rachel Vincent

#death

Sorry to hear about your Dad." He shrugged. "He was seventy, and we always told him fast food would kill him." "Heart attack?" "He was hit by a Pizza Express truck. ↗

— J.A. Konrath

#fast-food #humor #pizza #death

My love is pizza shaped. Won’t you have a slice? It’s circular, so there’s enough to go around.
 ↗

— Dora J. Arod

#food #life #love #love-quote #pizza

I’ve always wondered about people who live in their cars. I’ll bet for them ordering a pizza is kind of tricky. Should they have it delivered, or should they pick it up? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#pizza #funny

Where is the pizza I ordered 33 minutes ago? I specifically called for pizza to be delivered. The pizza’s missing, and so is the delivery guy. I hope nobody finds his body in the woods, naked, with extra pepperoni covering his nipples. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#naked #pizza #funny

People use the word 'love' a lot of different ways. Take me, for instance. I am often heard saying that I love my mom and dad. I am also often heard saying that I love pizza. What am I saying when I say I love my mom and dad? I'm saying that I care about them. I'm saying that I love spending time with them and that I talk to them every chance I get. I'm saying that if they needed me, I would do every humanly possible to help them. I'm saying that I always want what's best for them. What am I saying when I say I love pizza? Am I saying that I care deeply about pizza? Am I saying that I have a relationship with pizza? Am I saying that if pizza had a problem, I would be there for the pizza? (What? Not enough pepperoni? I'll be right there!) Of course not. When I say I love pizza, I'm just saying that I enjoy eating pizza until I don't want any more pizza. Once I'm tired of the pizza, I don't care what happens to the rest of it. I'll throw it away. I'll feed it to the dog. I'll stick it in the back of the refrigerator until it gets all green and moldy. It doesn't matter to me anymore. These are two very different definition of the word 'love'. It gets confusing when people start talking about love, and especially about loving you. Which way do these people love you? Do they want what is best for you, or do they just want you around because it is good for them, and they don't really care what happens to you? Next time someone looks deeply into your eyes and says 'I love you', look very deeply right back and say, 'Would that be pizza love, or the real thing? ↗

— Mary Beth Bonacci

#pizza-love #real-love #dating

Besides, there was something under the good girl facade. She hated me on sight because she’d been burned by someone like me before. No way was she a slut, though. Not even a reformed slut. I could spot them a mile away. My game face slowly melted away. I’d finally found a girl that was interesting enough to get to know, and a version of me had already hurt her. ↗

— Jamie McGuire

#pidgeon #pizza #travis-maddox #beauty

'Winning' in Hollywood means not just power, money, and complimentary smoked-salmon pizza, but also that everyone around you fails just as you are peaking. ↗

— Roseanne Barr

#around #complimentary #everyone #fails #hollywood