#pets

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail. ↗

— Fran Lebowitz

#pets

You said I could pet you as long as I liked.” “Didn't say I wouldn't try to fuck you in the middle of the petting.” Her eyes snapped up to meet his. “That's feline logic. You're a wolf.” “I'm learning from the best. ↗

— Nalini Singh

#riley #pets

I hate to be obvious," added the Scarecrow, "but you'd have saved yourself a heap of trouble if you weren't too cheap to invest in a leash, Dorothy. ↗

— Gregory Maguire

#pets

Cats are like walking brooms you can actually comfortably cuddle with.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cat #cats #clean #floor #funny

Grab life by the tail, and then pet it.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#animal #funny #humor #life #love

A brick has no legs, so it probably slithers like a snake. Therefore, a brick might make a good pet. And at least you wouldn’t have to walk it.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #dog

It’s true—there are only, like, two songs about rainbows, including that one. He should be asking why there are so few songs about rainbows. ↗

— Cheryl Cory

#funny #humor #kermit #muppets #music

Sometimes losing a pet is more painful than losing a human because in the case of the pet, you were not pretending to love it. ↗

— Amy Sedaris

#pets #humor

Did I ever tell you my pet peeve?' No,' I said. People who dress up their pets to look like Little Lord Fauntleroys or cowboys, clowns, ballerinas. As if it's not enough just to be a dog or cat or turtle. ↗

— Jerry Spinelli

#pets #love

Perhaps the greatest gift an animal has to offer is a permanent reminder of who we really are. ↗

— Nick Trout

#pets #love