#pee

Joshua's ministry was three years of preaching, sometimes three times a day, and although there were some high and low points, I could never remember the sermons word for word, but here's the gist of almost every sermon I ever heard Joshua give. You should be nice to people, even creeps. And if you: a) believed that Joshua was the Son of God (and) b) he had come to save you from sin (and) c) acknowledged the Holy Spirit within you (became as a little child, he would say) (and) d) didn't blaspheme the Holy Ghost (see c) then you would: e) live forever f) someplace nice g) probably heavan However, if you: h) sinned (and/or) i) were a hypocrite (and/or) j) valued things over people (and) k) didn't do a, b, c, and d, then you were: l) fucked ↗

— Christopher Moore

#speeches #humor

Proof' is the hallmark of religion. ↗

— Bill Gaede

#peer-review #proof #religion #science #theory

A bad conscience is easier to cope with than a bad reputation. ↗

— Friedrich Nietzsche

#herd-mentality #peer-pressure #reputation #science

Do you love me real or not real? ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#love

And though I was currently living a fairy tale, some part of my soul knew that happiness couldn't last forever. I didn't deserve a happily ever after, and there weren't many other cards to play when that was the truth. ↗

— Alysha Speer

#happiness #happy #love #sharden #soul

Gale is mine. I am his. Anything else is unthinkable." ~Katniss Everdeen ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#gale #hunger-games #katniss #love #lovers

This is the Speaker for the Dead? Judging someone by appearances?" "Maybe I've fallen in love with Grego." "You've always been a sucker for people who pee on you. ↗

— Orson Scott Card

#jane #judging #love #pee #love

You know where we got stuck? We were looking for faithfull, loving and perfect relationships-males who were always glad to see us." "So?" "We already have that!" "What do you mean?" "We've got dogs! ↗

— Joan Bauer

#humor #peeled #humor

Ay, but hearken, sir; though the chameleon Love can feed on the air, I am one that am nourished by my victuals, and would fain have meat. ↗

— William Shakespeare

#love #speed #humor

The tyranny of public opinion (and what an opinion!) is as fatuous in the small towns of France as it is in the United States of America. ↗

— Stendhal

#humor #mob-mentality #peer-pressure #humor