#owns

Death's gruesome face taunts: soulless eyes, crimson grimace. I really hate clowns. ↗

— Katherine Applegate

#horror #death

Remember back in forty-four when someone killed that pet parrot of yours? What was his name, Reynold? You know, the only friend you ever had? That was me, George. I fucked it to death then fed it to Goshy. ↗

— Will Elliott

#death

By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver! ↗

— John Green

#design

Her majesty is one verb short of a sentence. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#insults #put-downs #humor

Once again, I think there is little art being done that really owns up to such intense possibilities. ↗

— Peter Sotos

#art #being #being done #done #i

Was it animal pee or human pee? Someone asked. How would I know? What, am I an expert in the study of pee? ↗

— John Green

#humor #paper #pee #towns #funny

There are two types of people in this world. People who hate clowns...and clowns. (Bobby Pendragon) ↗

— D.J. MacHale

#humor #people #humor

You were with Margo Roth Spiegelman last night? At THREE A.M.? I nodded. Alone? I nodded. Oh my God, if you hooked up with her, you have to tell me every single thing that happened. You have to write me a term paper on the look and feel of Margo Roth Spiegelman's breasts. Thrity pages, minimum! I want you to do a photo-realistic pencil drawing. A sculpture would also be acceptable. I was wondering if it would be possible for you to write a sestina about Margo Roth Spiegelman's breasts? Your six words are: pink, round, firmness, succulent, supple, and pillowy. Personally, I think at least one of the words should be buhbuhbuhbuh. ↗

— John Green

#breasts #funny #humor #paper #towns

Everyone hates clowns," Otis said. "Even other clowns hate clowns. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #otis #the-mark-of-athena #humor

It's more impressive," I said out loud. "From a distance, I mean. You can't see the wear on things, you know? You can't see the rust or the weeds or the paint cracking. You see the place as someone once imagined it. ↗

— John Green

#paper-towns #imagination