#old

When I'm old I shall give up writing the big stuff and shall wander round the park thinking of songs. ↗

— George Lloyd

#big stuff #give #i #old #park

Patience and wisdom walk hand in hand, like two one-armed lovers. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#holding-hands #humor #life #love #lovers

The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg my friends to treat me that well. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#blindfolded #car #friends #friendship #funny

The funny thing about stop signs is that they're also start signs. ↗

— Maureen Johnson

#the-key-to-the-golden-firebird #funny

I love how babies look like old people. I saw a baby the other day that looked exactly like my grandpa, only taller. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #grandpa #old-people #funny

Next to coming to a good understanding with a new mistress, I love a quarrel with an old one. ↗

— George Etherege

#good #i #i love #love #mistress

And you'd think that killing people would make them like you, but it doesn't. It just- it just makes them dead. ↗

— Joe Walker (as Voldemort in AVPM)

#joe-walker #supermegafoxyawesomehot #totally-awesome #voldemort #wise-words

Speaking of… does this mean you get your phone back?” I shrug. “I don’t really want that phone back. I’m hoping my whipped boyfriend will get me an iPhone for Christmas. ↗

— Colleen Hoover

#dean-holder #funny #hopeless #iphone #sky-and-dean

Cat's friends seemed like very sweet girls," Dad says. "They were the bomb," I say fervently, and he looks back at me with raised eyebrows. "'The bomb' is a good thing? Like 'sick'? "Duh," I reply, and Dad lets out a sigh. "Thirteen-year-olds should come with subtitles," he says, turning onto our street. ↗

— Maya Gold

#language #oldies #sick #subtitles #youngsters

I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them. ↗

— Andy Bernard

#leaving-home #home