#naughty

Why send roses? Wouldn’t it be more romantic to deliver a dozen orgasms? For only $19.95, I’ll deliver them to your woman any day of the year. But be sure to book early for Valentine’s Day.
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— Jarod Kintz

#flowers #funny #humor #love #naughty

Blood rushed to the regions of my body that I associated with naughtiness, and I was powerless to stop it. ↗

— Kat Lowe

#lust #naughty #dreams

I have a whisper like a zipper. Your secret is safe in my pants.
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— Jarod Kintz

#humor #naughty #pants #safe #safety

I make believe like asexuals make love—alone, with cardboard tubes.
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— Jarod Kintz

#asexual #cardboard-tubes #imagination #love #make-believe

Of course, you’d warm up faster if you took your clothes off. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#jacob-black #nakedness #naughty #sweet-talk #talking

My voice went recently, never happened before, off like a tap. I had to sit in silence for nine days, chalkboard around my neck. Like an old-school mime. Like a kid in the naughty corner. Like a Victorian mute. ↗

— Adele

#before #corner #days #had #happened

Just because I look sexy on the cover of Rolling Stone doesn't mean I'm naughty. ↗

— Britney Spears

#cover #i #just #just because #look

My favorite color on canvas is nudity.

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— Jarod Kintz

#canvas #color #naughty #nude #nudity

No matter how bad things get, just keep looking up. Just keep looking up her skirt. Or his kilt. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#naughty #positive-attitude #skirt #attitude

My wife, a schoolteacher, very disciplined. If you think I'm tough, trust me, and wait till you see when the children are on the naughty step. It's hilarious. So we decided that I'm going to work like a donkey and provide amazing support for the family. ↗

— Gordon Ramsay

#children #decided #disciplined #donkey #family