#mustache

The tire left a skid mark on the road that looked like a mustache. So I shaved it off the pavement, stuffed it in my trunk, and took it home to wear to work the next day. Ah, but that’s life, no?
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— Jarod Kintz

#day #life #mustache #nonsense #pavement

Men always talk about the most important things to perfect strangers. In the perfect stranger we perceive man himself; the image of a God is not disguised by resemblances to an uncle or doubts of wisdom of a mustache. ↗

— Gilbert K. Chesterton

#always #disguised #doubts #god #himself

A mustache really defines your face. My dad had a mustache when I was growing up, and I can still remember when he shaved it, he looked like a completely different person. ↗

— Jason Sudeikis

#dad #defines #different #different person #face

Love is a winding mountainous road. Do you have an extra unicycle and handlebar mustache I can borrow?
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— Jarod Kintz

#humor #love #mountains #mustache #mustaches

Mustaches are so cool that I not only have one—I have two. I wear both of mine above my eyes.
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— Jarod Kintz

#eyes #funny #humor #mustache #mustaches

Orafoura paid me in pajamas, and I let him because the pajamas matched his plaid mustache.
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— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #mustache #orafoura #pajamas

Since I don't smoke, I decided to grow a mustache - it is better for the health. However, I always carried a jewel-studded cigarette case in which, instead of tobacco, were carefully placed several mustaches, Adolphe Menjou style. I offered them politely to my friends: "Mustache? Mustache? Mustache?" Nobody dared to touch them. This was my test regarding the sacred aspect of mustaches. ↗

— Salvador Dalí

#dalí #humor #mustache #humor

I've grown this mustache which saves me from having to glue on one every day in the heat. ↗

— Keith Carradine

#every #every day #glue #grown #having

You could say sorry," suggested Harry bluntly. "What, and get attacked by another flock of canaries?" muttered Ron. "What did you have to imitate her for?" "She laughed at my mustache!" "So did I, it was the stupidest thing I've ever seen. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#humor

A man once said, 'All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.' Mark Twain, you know. He had a fine mustache. Men of wisdom so often do. ↗

— Laini Taylor

#mark-twain #mustaches #humor