#morelli

I rushed us out of your parents' house because I didn't think I could manage two hours at the dinner table with everyone focused on Joe Loosey's joystick sitting in the refrigerator next to the applesauce. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#joe-morelli #humor

Fine. Let Ranger get someone else. Trust me, you don't want to be out looking for a parking place on Sloane in the middle of the night." I won't have to look for a parking place. Tank's picking me up. Your working with a guy name Tank? He's big. Jesus, Morelli said. I had to fall in love with a woman who works with a guy named Tank. You love me? Of course i love you. I just don't want to marry you. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#stephine #love

Next time I fall in love it's going to be with someone who isn't an expert in fibbing." "You're in love with me?" "You didn't know that?" "I did, but it's nice to hear." "Scares the hell out of me. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#stephanie-plum #love

Yeah. Almost as surprising as when you nailed me with your father's car." In the interest of avoiding confrontation, I felt compelled to explain. I didn't feel obliged to do it convincingly. "It was an accident. My foot slipped." "That was no accident. You jumped the goddamn curb and followed me down the sidewalk. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#stephanie-plum #money

Suppose I lay down on the pavement and you run over me a few times with my own car...just for old times. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#money

Honey, a man can't keep his gun in a cookie jar. It just isn't done. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#guns

Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these things. I need a rap cheat sheet. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#morelli #ranger #stephanie-plum #to-the-nines #cheating

You ever get any death threats? How about ex-husbands or ex-boyfriends? You run over anyone recently?” ~ Morelli ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#joe-morelli #morelli #stephanie-plum #death

My sex life is okay." "Yeah," Morelli said. "But sometimes it's fun to have a partner. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#joe-morelli #stephanie-plum #humor

I don't believe this," Morelli yelled. "I don't fucking believe this. What do you do, sit in bed at night and think about ways to fuck up my life? ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#stephanie-plum #life