#mo

(1)BEING A POET is like opening a car door & exposing yourself. (2)BEING A GOOD POET is like opening the door & exposing the passenger as well. ↗

— Chocolate Waters

#poetry-quotes #humor

And now she has you seizing control of my army.” “Your army? I thought this was Gaunt’s.” “So did he. ↗

— Michael J. Sullivan

#humor

Our English monarchs are so unimaginative,” said Eldric. “They execute people in such tediously conventional ways. ↗

— Franny Billingsley

#humor #monarchy #humor

Tirition-turning evil companies' secrets into horror rps since 2007. ↗

— Tirition

#humor #roleplay #humor

So. You're a fallen angel." She folded her arms. "I'm not fallen," he said roughly. "Then what are you?" He shrugged. "Busted. ↗

— Vicki Pettersson

#fallen-angels #humor #noir #humor

Okay, 'Best Party Ever' -- to me, that's like saying 'Best Gym Ever' or 'Best Nature Documentary Ever,' like how good can it really be? ↗

— Lena Dunham

#humor

(LuAnn) Whatever. That'll teach me not to build my life around a man whose favorite book is Atlas Shrugged. Listen, kid." She waggles her finger, as if scolding me. "Nothing good comes from Ayn RAnd. Trust me on this. ↗

— Abby McDonald

#humor #humor

It was pretty late and the streets were quiet so she was almost sure no one had seen her drag the soul eater into the alley... where she cut his head off with a samurai sword. God, she loved her life. ↗

— Samantha Young

#samurai #sword #violent #humor

You're a cop. I need a doughnut. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#humor #stereotype #humor

The general intellectual level of South Florida is somewhere just above "functionally retarded". ↗

— Tucker Max

#humor #intelligence #humor