#lol

when life gives you lemons add beer ↗

— Letter String

#life

And I've got THIS," I pulled out the signum and held it up for him to see, "that says I'm kindred. And I've got THIS," I pointed at my head, "that says I'm as smart as you. And I have THIS," I held up my middle finger, "that says go to hell, you immortal bigot." And with that I spun around and stomped out the door, filing the expression on Arthur's face in a mental folder labeled "Kate's Proudest Moments". ↗

— Amy Plum

#lol #revenants #until-i-die #immortality

How funny would it be if we left a trail of Faerie dust in our wake?” “That would be hilarious.” I laughed. “It’s a shame we don’t produce any.” Do we? I idiotically shook my hand as I tried to brandish Faerie dust like Tinkerbell. It didn’t work. ↗

— Cesya MaRae Cuono

#elemental-reality #lola #funny

You're the most annoying girl on the planet. You make me want to throw myself off a bridge. And, unfortunately, I am one hundred percent, head-over-heels, crazy in love with you. ↗

— Cecily White

#lol #love #love

My friends call me Wrath," says Raffe. "My enemies call me Please Have Mercy. What's your name, soldier boy?" Raffe's mocking tone brings a flush to my cheeks for no reason. ↗

— Susan Ee

#love-him #supermegafoxyawesomehot #love

Your... Your aura. It's... amazing. It's shining. I mean, it always shines, but today... Well I've never seen anything like it. I didn't expect that after everything that happened.' I shifted around uncomfortably. If I lit up around Dimitri normally, what on earth happened to my aura post-sex? ↗

— Richelle Mead

#dirty #funny #hathaway #humor #ivashkov

Why are there so many people out here?' Boomer asked as we bobbed and weaved roughly forward. 'Christmas shopping.' I explained. 'Already? Isn't it early to returning things?' I really had no sense of how his mind worked. ↗

— David Levithan

#christmas-shopping #dash #humor #lol #no-sense

A classroom . People trying to stick me in classrooms was becoming as predictable and annoying as people trying to kill me, but with less-fun results. ↗

— James Patterson

#humor #lol #school #funny

(Jace) "Is there anything special you want to see? Paris? Budapest? The Leaning Tower of Pisa?" Only if it falls on Sebastian's head, she thought. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#clary-fray #jace #lol #sebastian #paris

Archer! Let us fetch a spot of tea, old boy! ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#tea