#jokes

This is our lance. See, you're making me laugh about this now, because there have been a few jokes on the set about what they actually look like. But, see, I personally think they'd be a great toy. So... just batteries aren't included. ↗

— Kevin Sorbo

#actually #batteries #because #been #few

The whole experience of doing a sitcom is... Telling jokes with such precision is really exciting, but it's also terrifying. ↗

— Lea Thompson

#doing #exciting #experience #jokes #precision

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling. ↗

— Friedrich Nietzsche

#humour #jokes #death

I frowned as my fingers throbbed. “Wait a sec. There’s a chance I can’t work with fire and you let me do that?”“How else am I going to figure out your limitations?” “What the hell!” I pulled my hand free, furious. “That’s not cool, Blake. What’s next? Trying to stop a moving vehicle by standing in front of it, but whoops, I can’t do that and now I’m dead? ↗

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

#death-jokes #funny #ssupernatural #training #ya

I have been so very, very fortunate in my life. I've met or been in contact with several of my childhood heroes. I've interacted with people all over this planet, and even though I couldn't possibly hope to remember all their names, I remember a photograph, a poem, a sound, a joke, kind words of encouragement. All is not lost. ↗

— Wayne Gerard Trotman

#encouragement #friendship #good-fortune #heroes #interaction

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking. ↗

— Dave Barry

#humour #jokes #funny

Your mom is so old, she might die soon ↗

— A really great comedian

#i-think-i-died-when-i-read-that #jokes #funny

I've said it before and I'll say it again, my lord. You are an evil man. ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#jokes #kel #raoul #humor

Ah, Signor Halt,' he said uncertainly, 'you are making a joke, yes?' 'He is making a joke, no,' Will said. 'But he likes to think he is making a joke, yes. ↗

— John Flanagan

#jokes #ranger-s-apprentice #humor

Jokes are hilarious only when you take them unreal and dreamlike, otherwise it becomes painful. So I always live otherworldly... ↗

— Saket Assertive

#reality #truth-inspirational #inspirational