#joke

The whole experience of doing a sitcom is... Telling jokes with such precision is really exciting, but it's also terrifying. ↗

— Lea Thompson

#doing #exciting #experience #jokes #precision

Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking. ↗

— Amy Sedaris

#jokes #relationships #romance #dating

Pathetic," he (Fred) told George. "Pathetic! With the whole wide world of ear-related humor, you go with 'holey'? ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#fred-weasley #george-weasley #hole #joke #death

A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling. ↗

— Friedrich Nietzsche

#humour #jokes #death

The marvelous thing about a joke with a double meaning is that it can only mean one thing. ↗

— Ronnie Barker

#double #double meaning #joke #marvelous #marvelous thing

I've included these little jokes and mysteries in my writing for the amusement of readers. ↗

— Armistead Maupin

#i #included #jokes #little #mysteries

I frowned as my fingers throbbed. “Wait a sec. There’s a chance I can’t work with fire and you let me do that?”“How else am I going to figure out your limitations?” “What the hell!” I pulled my hand free, furious. “That’s not cool, Blake. What’s next? Trying to stop a moving vehicle by standing in front of it, but whoops, I can’t do that and now I’m dead? ↗

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

#death-jokes #funny #ssupernatural #training #ya

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks!” -Totie Fields- ↗

— David DeBacco

#diet #jokes #diet

. . .when the album was done I loved it. It was a mixture of electric and acoustic solo performances with dubs. I called it Le Noise, after Dan. It was a French Canadian joke, a very English was of saying Lanois. I was doing a show that introduced a lot of the songs, and things were going great. I was very happy. ↗

— Neil Young

#joke #dreams

It's salt. Why don't you sprinkle some on me, honey? Aren't I just good enough to eat? ↗

— Grant Morrison

#food #joker #madness #food