#irony

I have great faith in fools - self-confidence my friends will call it. ↗

— Edgar Allan Poe

#fool #humor #self-confidence #self-irony #faith

Assumptions are unopened windows that foolish birds fly into, and their broken bodies are evidence gathered too late. ↗

— Bryan Davis

#blunt #comical #funny #harsh #irony

It would be the last thing he did if he beat my dog. ↗

— Holly Hood

#irony #sarcasm #funny

She had hit rock-bottom. She had given a blow job to a man who for all intents and purposes, was a bum. He had smelled so bad, she forced him to spray on some of the perfume she always carried in her purse. Her favorite perfume. After tonight, she was quitting. Yeah, she’d have to go back home with her two kids, grovel to her mama and work a dead-end job, but anything was better than getting down on your knees to give a guy as disgusting as Lenny a one-off. ↗

— A.T. Hicks

#humor #irony #prostitute #strip-club #home

I'm being ironic. Don't interrupt a man in the midst of being ironic, it's not polite. There! ↗

— Ray Bradbury

#irony #humor

Anyway, I'm in bed with her, with her bracelets. Her face is a blank, so I darken the lights. Off go her silky undergarments. The bracelets are all she has on. They glint slightly, a pleasant muffled clinking on the sheets. I have a hard-on. Which, halfway down the ladder, is what I noticed. Just great. Why now? Why didn't I get an erection when I needed one? And why was I getting so excited over two lousy bracelets? Especially under this slicker, with the world about to end. ↗

— Haruki Murakami

#humor #irony #humor

They say a woman's loyalty only lasts as long as it takes her to hang up and dial again. ↗

— Kim Gatlin

#irony #loyalty #woman #humor

What is all this? Get him out of here, devil take me!” And that one, imagine, smiles and says: “Devil take you? That, in fact, can be done!” And—bang! ↗

— Mikhail Bulgakov

#devil #irony #imagination

He led them around the base of a great fallen tree whose exposed roots resembled more than anything else a huge broom - a broom that would have fired the imagination of Rachel the Dragon toward heroic, legendary feats of sweeping. ↗

— Tad Williams

#irony #imagination

Imagine the wizened quality of a life blanched of contradiction and double standard. p 44 ↗

— Michael Perry

#imagination