#humorous

She shrugged and flipped her glossy hair behind her shoulders. "What else do you have to do with your time besides think about stuff like this? It's not like you're real heavy into extracurriculars. Besides, you're all, like, goth and into the dead, right?" Alona Dare, queen of the insult-compliment. "Wow. Thanks. Anyone ever tell you you're good with people?" She frowned. "No." "Good. I'm not goth." "Your hair is black, you have piercings, you wear black all the time and act all freaky-" "My hair is naturally this color. I have three earings in one ear, that's it. This shirt" -I tugged at the fabric across my chest- "is navy blue, and if I act weird all the time, it's because of ghosts like you. ↗

— Stacey Kade

#humor

I was cold, hungry, and in a hole in the ground. But at least I had my elven porn, damnit! ↗

— Kim Harrison

#humor

I de­ci­ded right then and the­re to ma­ke a snic­ker­do­od­le per­fu­me to we­ar, so that one day he wo­uld sniff me li­ke that. ↗

— Jessica Verday

#humor

It was like there was an elephant in the room. An elephant that expected us to have sex. ↗

— Morgan Matson

#humor

We're going to the Underworld," Izzy said. She bounced a little as she said it, her eyes bright and her tone implying that "the Underworld" was akin to "Candy Land. ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#humor

I can't forget things, or ignore them-bad things that happen," I said. "I'm a lay-it-all-out person, a dwell-on-it person, an obsess-about-it person. If I hold things in and try to forget or pretend, I become a madman and have panic attacks. I have to talk. ↗

— E. Lockhart

#girls #humor #humorous #humour #humor

I lifted my wand, hoping she would see this as a dramatic move, not a threat. “Why once, in my bunker at Charing Cross Station, I stalked the deadly prey known as Jelly Babies.” Neith’s eyes widened. “They are dangerous?” “Horrible,” I agreed. “Oh, they seem small alone, but they always appear in great numbers. Sticky, fattening—quite deadly. There I was, alone with only two quid and a Tube pass, beset by Jelly Babies, when…Ah, but never mind. When the Jelly Babies come for you…you will find out on your own.” She lowered her bow. “Tell me. I must know how to hunt Jelly Babies.” I looked at Walt gravely. “How many months have I trained you, Walt?” “Seven,” he said. “Almost eight.” “And have I ever deemed you worthy of hunting Jelly Babies with me?” “Uh…no. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor

I don't necessarily agree with everything that I say. ↗

— Marshall McLuhan

#humor

Leo could run pretty fast when someone was trying to kill him. Sadly, he’d had a lot of practice. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor

face touchage" "lame-sauce" "Sulky McSulkerton ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#humor