#humorous

Leah" Olivia says quietly, "if you point at me again I'm going to break that manicured finger right off your hand. Now turn around and smile, your daughter is waking up. ↗

— Tarryn Fisher

#humorous #love

Listen, I'd rather lie naked in a plowed field under an incontinent horse for a week than have to read that paragraph again! ↗

— Diane Ackerman

#humor #humorous #love

If you are not dancing, your dead. ↗

— Lisa Alpine

#humorous #inspirational #inspirational

If you're on your back, you're not on your feet! ↗

— Sylvia Day

#inspirational

Now, Jasper, as a great man once said, 'A brave and steadfast heart can overcome any fear.' So don't worry. I'll be back with Benelaius shortly. In the meantime, look about for clues, only don't disturb anything." [...] I knew only too well who that great man was whom he spoke of. Camber Fosrick. I had committed the quote to memory as well. So Lindavar, one of the War Wizards of Cormyr, was addicted to trashy literature too. I would have chuckled had I not been so scared. ↗

— Chet Williamson

#inspirational #inspirational

Enjoy every ounce of your life, get high and be sincere to anybody that comes around you. ↗

— Salman Aditya

#humorous-quotations #inspirational #humor

I'm OK with being single, but I'm not OK when the time comes where I have to move my furniture around and to change the high ceiling light balls... ↗

— Hiroko Sakai

#humorous #light-ball #love #single #single-life

His attention caught, her companion raised his eyes from the book which lay open beside him on the table and directed them upon her in a look of aloof enquiry. 'What's that? Did you say something to me, Venetia?' 'Yes, love,' responded his sister cheerfully, 'but it wasn't of the least consequence, and in any event I answered for you. You would be astonished, I daresay, if you knew what interesting conversations I enjoy with myself. ↗

— Georgette Heyer

#intelligent-conversation #intelligence

The streak of bleach in my hair is as obvious as ever. Am I really going out in public like this? I push my hair backward and forward a few times - but I can't hide it. Maybe I could walk along with my hand carelessly positioned at my head, as if I'm thinking hard. I attempt a few casual, pensive poses in the mirror. "Is your head all right?" I swivel round in shock to see Nathaniel at the open door, wearing a plaid shirt and jeans. "Er...fine," I say, my hand still glued to my head. "I was just..." Oh, there's no point. I bring my hand down from my hair and Nathaniel regards the streak for a moment. "It looks nice," he says. "Like a badger." "A badger?" I say, affronted. "I don't look like a badger." "Badgers are beautiful creatures," says Nathaniel with a shrug. "I'd rather look like a badger than a stoat. ↗

— Sophie Kinsella

#beauty

I'm not helping any of you freaks!" she shouts. "I'm not the Witch of Wayland, you hear me? I'm sick of all you mutants pounding on my door for love spells and all the like! I told you, I don't do that backwoods modern-day, wannabe Wiccafuck stuff! You hear me? ↗

— J.A. Redmerski

#love