#humorous

All real estate agents should be put on a decommissioned naval frigate which is then towed out into the deepest part of the Atlantic and sunk. It's rather unfortunate that, in recent years, real estate agents have become comedy betes-noires. Rather like lawyers or used car salesmen. Every time they mention their job they probably get people amusingly making the sign of the cross at them or are subjected to some good-natured, humorous ribbing. This has the effect of distorting what I'm trying to say here, which isn't in the nature of a smiling roll of the eyes and a "Tsk, real estate agents, eh?" but rather "All real estate agents should be put on a decommissioned naval frigate which is then towed out into the deepest part of the Atlantic and sunk. ↗

— Mil Millington

#humorous-quotes #real-estate-agents #nature

From the bow of the canoe she asked, "Do you know a rain dance?" "First I need a virgin. ↗

— Carl Hiaasen

#nature

Nature" doesn't really have intentions, per se. Nature is a drunk waking up from a weekend bender, ambling through a messy kitchen in a pair of mismatched slippers, seeing its car in the neighbor's pool and saying, "Ah good. It was dirty. Just the thing. ↗

— Pat Connid

#humor #humorous #humour #nature #nature

I glance down, and my eyes get big. "What?" He glances down, realizes why my eyes are big, and shrugs his shoulders. "It's morning." "It's cute. Can I keep it? ↗

— Jillian Dodd

#lol-cute #rolling-with-laughter #lol

There's a few tunes of mine that don't have jokes, but most of them have a joke and they have a humorous point of view somewhere. ↗

— Mose Allison

#humorous #joke #jokes #mine #most

Eventually I would like to touch all the genres. I would like to do some detective stories, and I want to do a Western. I would want to do humorous Westerns. ↗

— Sergio Aragones

#detective stories #eventually #genres #humorous #i

A friend told me that one day he and I would be rich and famous. I told him that I'd trade my half of the fame, for his half of the money. ↗

— Quentin R. Bufogle

#humorous #money #money

Years ago there was an old man I knew that told me he didn't trust me, because people with beards were hiding from something. I told him, "That's true, I'm hiding from the barber!! ↗

— Neil Leckman

#life-and-living #life

I'm just trying to portray what I find ironic or humorous. ↗

— Max Cannon

#humorous #i #ironic #just #portray

Democracy was supposed to champion freedom of speech, and yet the simple rules of table decorum could clamp down on the rights their forefathers had fought and died for. ↗

— E.A. Bucchianeri

#democracy #ettiquette #freedom #freedom-of-speech #funny