#humor

I was glad to be made aware that “Veimke” (jeune fille au pair), is subject to natural law, and can be made fat, by such things as poor diet, and alcohol. ↗

— Roman Payne

#au-pair #diet #germans #humor #humour

I just can’t trim down. My skeleton is in the way. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#funny #humor #diet

Delia was an overbearing cake with condescending frosting, and frankly, I was on a diet. ↗

— Maggie Stiefvater

#diet #frosting #humor #metaphor #diet

A sharp bolt of hunger hit Luther hard. His knees almost buckled, his poker face almost grimaced. For two weeks now his sense of smell had been much keener, no doubt a side effect of a strict diet. Maybe he got a whiff of Mabel's finest, he wasn't sure, but a craving came over him. Suddenly, he had to have something to eat. Suddenly, he wanted to snatch the bag from Kendall, rip open a package, and start gnawing on a fruitcake. ↗

— John Grisham

#fruitcake #humor #humour #skipping-christmas #diet

Wearing that personal trainer nametag doesn't make you right #AHOLE ↗

— Andy Ostrom

#exercise #funny #humor #life #workout

We... Charlotta the Fourth and I... live in defiance of every known law of diet." ~ Miss Lavendar, chap 27 ↗

— L.M. Montgomery

#humor #l-m-montgomery #diet

I'd like to lose enough weight so that my bones creaked louder than the floor ↗

— Stanley Victor Paskavich

#funny-quotes #humor #weight-loss #diet

Facebook has been spreading across the continents faster than a highly contagious Asian bird flu! ↗

— Gemini Adams

#facebook #flu #humor #humor-books #social-media

Mein Liebster ist fertig mit der Diät. […] Praktikantinnen machen ihm Komplimente, und er fühlt sich herrlich. - über ihren Lebensgefährten Gert Scobel. ↗

— Susanne Frohlich

#german #humor #diet

If you avoid the killer diseases and keep the degenerative ones under control with sensible diet and exercise and whatever chemotherapy you need to stay in balance, you can live nearly forever. ↗

— Wallace Stegner

#diet