#hum

I don’t believe him,” said Hermione in a very unsteady voice, the moment they were out of earshot of Hagrid. “I don’t believe him. I really don’t believe him. . . .” “Calm down,” said Harry. “Calm down!” she said feverishly. “A giant! A giant in the forest! And we’re supposed to give him English lessons! Always assuming, of course, we can get past the herd of murderous centaurs on the way in and out! I — don’t — believe — him! ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#centaurs #duty #humor #promises #humor

مجموعة شباب في عمر الورد ، حيارى وسط أنواء السياسة المصرية ، ضعاف بلا حول في مجتمع يدوس بقسوة على الضعفاء .. غير مؤمنين بما هو كائن .. ولكن ليس لدينا خطة بما ينبغي أن يكون . خلاصة القول أننا مجموعة من الوطنيين نحب الوطن المريض ولكن ليس لدينا وجهة نظر بشأن علاج هذا الوطن الذي أشرف على الهلاك المبين ! ↗

— محمود السعدني

#humor

Daemon had written: "What do you do when she asks a question no man would give a child an answer to?" Saetan had replied: "Hope you're obliging enough to answer it for me. However, if you're backed into a corner, refer her to me. I've become accustomed to being shocked. ↗

— Anne Bishop

#humor

Never run after a man or a bus, there's always another one in five minutes. ↗

— Cherry Adair

#military #romantic-suspense #humor

I've never owned a telescope, but it's something I'm thinking of looking into. ↗

— George Carlin

#humor

Shoulda, woulda, coulda. They were the Three Stooges of regret. All they were good for was saying whoop-whoop-whoop and smacking each other over the head. ↗

— Thea Harrison

#humor

But the Courts aren't places humans are supposed to be, especially the Unseelie Court. Most faeries won't even go there." We have to go - we have to get Ravus's heart. He's going to die if we don't." what are we going to do? Go down there and ask for it?" Pretty much. ↗

— Holly Black

#humor

Here you go, dear."" The corners of Mrs. Colbert's mouth curled up. "You like meat, don't you?" Emily blinked. Was it her, or did that statement seem...loaded? She checked Issac for his reaction, but he was innocently selecting a roll from a wicker basket. "Uh, thanks." Emily said, pulling the platter toward her. She did like meat. The kind you, um, eat. ↗

— Sara Shepard

#suggestive #humor

I picked up my mocha and stood. The cup was still almost half-full, but I didn't want it anymore. Besides, it was now luke-warm. Which meant I didn't have to worry if it was scalding him when I tossed the remains in Ethan's face.I think Finn might have craked a smileas he held the door open for me, but I wasn't sure. ↗

— Jenna Black

#ethan #finn #humor #mocha #humor

I turned to my own bunk and examined it with a kind of appalled fascination. If the mattress stains were anything to go by, a previous user had not so much suffered from incontinence as rejoiced in it. He had evidently included the pillow in his celebrations. ↗

— Bill Bryson

#travel #humor