#hum

Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?" "Yes," said Harry stiffly. "Yes, sir." "There's no need to call me "sir" Professor." The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#rebellion #sarcasm #humor

I don't want to be a man," said Jace. "I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can't confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead." "Well," said Luke, "you're doing a fantastic job. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#demons #growing-up #humor #jace-wayland #luke

Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#humor #simile #humor

I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#humor

Reading is one form of escape. Running for your life is another. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#humor

Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be. ↗

— Mark Twain

#writing #humor

Never memorize something that you can look up. ↗

— Albert Einstein

#science #humor

There are two motives for reading a book; one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it. ↗

— Bertrand Russell

#humor #humor

The meek may inherit the earth, but at the moment it belongs to the conceited. Like me. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #jace-wayland #quotes #humor

Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on? ↗

— J.R.R. Tolkien

#semantics #suspicion #humor