#hum

To be ethical is to endeavor to find one's proper place in the larger scheme of things rather than to seek to assert human superiority over the natural world. ↗

— Gary Steiner

#humanity #morality #speciesism #life

And I find chopsticks frankly distressing. Am I alone in thinking it odd that a people ingenious enough to invent paper, gunpowder, kites and any number of other useful objects, and who have a noble history extending back 3,000 years haven't yet worked out that a pair of knitting needles is no way to capture food? ↗

— Bill Bryson

#humor #food

The Romans always wanted bread and circuses-food and entertainement! As we destroy their city, I will offer them both. Behold, a sample!" Someething dropped from the ceiling and landed at Percy's feet: a loaf of sandwich bread in a white plastic wrapper with red and yellow dots. Percy picked it up. "Wonder bread?" "Magnificent, isn't it?" Ephialtes eyes danced with crazy excitement. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humour #percy-jackson #wonder-bread #food

Emma, we don't have to kiss. She already knows I want to sleep with you. ↗

— Anna Banks

#humor #of-poseidon #humor

Doña Remedios, like her husband, was quite traditional and not trendy enough to understand concepts like natural birth or the importance of a friendly environment for the newborn. Birth might be natural, but she didn’t think it should be a pain for the mother or an inconvenience for the mother’s family. How friendly can it be for a baby to be born to her mother’s screaming her head off and everybody running around like lunatics? ↗

— Olga Núñez Miret

#family

Imogen was a bright girl naturally, but she had read so many novels that her brain was completely turned. ↗

— Susan Coolidge

#reading #family

For that matter, all this, is there a God? Corlis -- I don't care!" "Huh," I considered. "I guess I don't either". "Most people don't! All they care about," he added grimly, "is being right". ↗

— Lionel Shriver

#family

She is my companion on my many genealogical hunts, and I will be forever indebted to her for the knowledge that she bequeathed to me. And I can think of nobody I would rather traipse through a cemetery with, and that says a lot about a person. ↗

— Rett MacPherson

#humor #family

A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don't think of it first. ↗

— Oscar Levant

#pun #humor

An English gentleman never shines his shoes, but then nor does a lazy bastard. ↗

— Will Self

#humor