#hobbes

A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do. ↗

— Bill Watterson

#calvin #calvin-and-hobbes #procrastination #procrastination

I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin ↗

— Bill Watterson

#calvin #calvin-and-hobbes #funny #song #funny

Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I'd say our afternoon just got booked solid! ↗

— Bill Watterson

#calvin-and-hobbes #comic #comic-strips #comics #hobbes

They say the secret of success is being at the right place at the right time, but since you never know when the right time is going to be, I figure the trick is to find the right place and just hang around. ↗

— Bill Watterson

#humor

Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him? ↗

— Bill Watterson

#hobbes #humor #puddle #reflection #humor

A precursor to the Social Darwinists, Hobbes argued from th premise that the primordial human condition was a war fought by each against each, so brutal and incesssant that it was impossible to develop industry or even agriculture or the arts while that condition persisted. It's this description that culmintes in his famous epithet "And the life of man, solitary, poor, brutish, and short." It was a fiction to which he brought to bear another fiction, that of the social contract by which men agree to submit to rules and a presiding authority, surrendering their right to ravage each other for the sake of their own safety. The contract was not a bond of affection or identification, bot a culture or religion binding togetehr a civilization, only a convenience. Men, in his view, as in that of many other European writers of the period, are stark, mechanical creatures, windup soldiers social only by strategy and not by nature... ↗

— Rebecca Solnit

#paradise-built-in-hell #social #art

Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty. Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information. ↗

— Bill Watterson

#hobbes #humor #intelligence #humor

I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness. ↗

— Bill Watterson

#humor #life #humor

Until you stalk and overrun, you cannot devour anyone. -Hobbes ↗

— Bill Watterson

#calvin-and-hobbes #humor #humor

CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card. HOBBES: From Susie Derkins! CALVIN: It says "Please be my Valentine." HOBBES: You're Susie's Valentine! CALVIN: I'm not her Valentine just because I got this in the mail, am I? Does the Post Master General know about this? HOBBES: Calvin and Susie, sitting in a tree-ee! Kay-eye-ess-ess-eye-en-gee! CALVIN: I don't have the KISS her, do I?! Is that what Valentines do??! Oh, gross! HOBBES: First comes lo-ove, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage! CALVIN: This can't be happening! I need a lawyer! She can't make me be her Valentine! HOBBES: Here she comes! Here comes Susie! SUSIE: Hi, Calvin. CALVIN: Get away from me! I'm not your Valentine! Take your card back! Eww! Girls! YECCHH! SUSIE: That card wasn't for YOU, you Moron. Didn't you read the back of the envelope? CALVIN: "Calvin, please give this to Hobbes." HOBBES?! HOBBES: Me? Really? Hot dog! Smooch City, here I come! ↗

— Bill Watterson

#calvin-and-hobbes-bill-watterson #envelope #hobbes #mail #smooch