#hilarious

In the beginning, I would find a character I understood. That was my focus. Not now - but you basically get offered the exact same thing you just did. Which I find hilarious. I did 'The Vow,' and then I had every love story you can imagine thrown at me. And now I'm getting offers for comedies. ↗

— Channing Tatum

#beginning #character #comedies #did #every

There are only so many hilarious actors so when they cross-pollinate, people assume it's always the same actors and directors. ↗

— Judd Apatow

#assume #directors #hilarious #many #only

I can't see anything" he said in a muffled voice, hand over his eyes. "I'm blind. ↗

— L.J. Smith

#hilarious #funny

Lying is a full time occupation, even if you tell just one, because once you tell it, you're stuck with it. If you want to do it right, you have to visualize it, conjure the graphics, tone, and sequence of action, then relate it purposefully in the midst of seemingly spontaneous dialogue. The more actual the lie becomes to the listener, the more actual it becomes to the teller, which is scariest of all. Some people really get to believing their own lies. ↗

— Hilary Thayer Hamann

#lies #hilarious

You will be interested to hear, Hilary, that it [the drug] had a most remarkable effect — even on Selena after a very modest quantity. She cast off all conventional restraints and devoted herself without shame to the pleasure of the moment." I asked for particulars of this uncharacteristic conduct. "She took from her handbag a paperback edition of Pride and Prejudice and sat on the sofa reading it, declining all offers of conversation. ↗

— Sarah Caudwell

#humour #jane-austen #hilarious

Damn it! I knew she was a monster! John! Amy! Listen! Guard your buttholes. ↗

— David Wong

#funny #hilarious #spiders #funny

Okay, well I think the programme is like being screamed at for an hour by a drunk with a strobe-light, but like I said-- ↗

— David Nicholls

#hilarious #saracasm #funny

It wasn’t enough that I had to worry about playing well and winning the game, but I also had to deal with possibility that one of my teammates could be dragged off the field by the inhabitants of the mental hospital. ↗

— Weston Locher

#comedy #essays #funny #hilarious #humor

No," Nathan grumbled. "Like, not piss on him, just all around him." Stuart raised an eyebrow. "Nath, you need to chill. We're in a bar, a busy bar. We can't stop people talking to each other." "I know but-" "Look, don't worry about it," Stuart insisted. "Try not to turn into a bunny boiler just yet. ↗

— Melanie Tushmore

#jealousy #business

Pussy punch: when a twat tap just isn't enough ↗

— Tara Sivec

#seduction