#hero

My superhero weapon is my Anti-Gravity Goo Shooter. I was born with it, and at the gym it’s known as my “penis. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #superhero #funny

Hi Liz! You're home!" I replied, my voice louder than it probably should've been. "Hey, how's it going?" she asked, her eyes narrowing and moving shiftily from me to Peter and back. "It's going good. Even better. Is it? Yeah, I guess. Good. Really good. Totally better," I babbled, while Peter could only manage a raised hand in greeting and a weird phrase like, "Down the basement." Liz rolled her eyes and trudged off, calling back as she vanished from view, "I want the results of pregnancy tests from both of you by the time I get out of the shower! ↗

— Hayden Thorne

#masks-series #superheroes #home

I don't do what I'm told, but I might do what you want if you ask me nicely. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#imogen-herondale #impudence #jace-wayland #obedience #rebelliousness

Nick: How? Are you a vampire or something? What made you immortal? Acheron: Real good DNA. ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#humor #humor

The meeting was like a war council with donuts. Then again, back at Camp Half-Blood they used to have their most serious discussions around the Ping-Pong table in the rec room with crackers and Cheez Whiz, so Percy felt right at home. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #percy-jackson #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #the-mark-of-athena #war-council

Percy?" Annabeth gripped his arm. "Oh, bad," he muttered. "Bad. Bad." He looked across the table at Frank and Hazel. "You guys remember Polybotes?" "The giant who invaded Camp Jupiter," Hazel said. "The anti-Poseidon you whacked in the head with a Terminus statue. Yes, I think I remember ↗

— Rick Riordan

#camp-jupiter #hazel-levesque #heroes-of-olympus #humor #percy-jackson

Down in the water, Octavian yelled, “Get me out of here! I’ll kill you!” “Tempting,” Percy called down. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #octavian #percy-jackson #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #the-mark-of-athena

Coach Hedge yelled,“Thar she blows! Kansas, ahoy!” “Holy Hephaestus,” Leo muttered. “He really needs to work on his shipspeak. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#heroes-of-olympus #humor #kansas #leo-valdez #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians

Percy was getting tired of water. If he said that aloud, he would probably get kicked out of Poseidon’s Junior Sea Scouts, but he didn’t care. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#percy-jackson #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #poseidon #the-heroes-of-olympus #the-mark-of-athena

Hazel!” he yelled. “That box! Open it!” She hesitated, then saw the box he meant. Te label read WARNING. DO NOT OPEN. “Open it!” Leo yelled again. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#heroes-of-olympus #humor #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #the-mark-of-athena #humor