Read through the most famous quotes by topic #funeral
Funerals consist of older generations initiating the younger into another adulthood. Filling spaces of the one passed. ↗
Do you really think anyone needs some kind of notarized statement saying 'Dear Saint Peter, here's another stiff, pass him through the gates, signed, Father McGonnigill.'...'PS: He once had a hot dog on a Friday, but don't hold that against him.' ↗
#funerals #lady-crymsyn #religion-philosophy #vampire-files #death
When you're dead, they really fix you up. I hope to hell when I do die somebody has sense enough to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddam cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody. ↗
#death #funeral-rites #holden #hope
Love is like wearing all red to a funeral, out of respect for the fact that the recently deceased got stabbed 17 times by a cherry Kool-Aid flavored icicle. I'd also recommend bringing your own boom box blasting out "Ice Ice Baby" as you dance down the aisle of the church. ↗
The accumulation of birthdays is the leading cause of death in the United States and other large land masses. Now while that may not be 100% accurate, it is at least 88% accurate. Actually, the last sentence itself might not have been 100% accurate, but I’m 88% sure it was. Maybe I should just brush up on fractions and percentages before making statements that are liable to hurt the funeral industry, because if birthdays aren’t killing people then it’s bad for the mortality business. And if you can’t trust somebody to die, then you can’t trust somebody. But I’m somebody you can trust. I’m at least 88% trustworthy, at least 88% of the time. ↗